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Alexis: You're having sex with Max. That's your principle client's number one henchman. What on earth were you thinking?

Max: Yeah, what were you thinking?

Diane: Emotions are running very high since Michael got shot. Max and I were looking for a little mutual consolation.

Alexis: In the middle of Sonny's living room?

Max: The boss isn't here.

Diane: And now might be a very good time for you to make a discreet exit.

Alexis: I don't want to be here any more than you want me here. What I have just seen has burned holes through my corneas.

Diane: Oh, stop it.

Alexis: As your friend and colleague, I'm going to stay here because you seem to be making very self-destructive choices.

Max: Excuse me. I happen to hold Ms. Miller in a very high esteem.

Diane: Thank you, Max.

Alexis: I'm sure you do.

Diane: That's very kind of you to say.

Alexis: I'm sure you do, Max, and I say this in the nicest possible way, but you're a thug.

Max: I'm a bodyguard.

Alexis: He's a minion to a thug. And this is okay with you? You're sleeping with a flunky.

Max: What?

Diane: Alexis, while I appreciate your concern, however misguided, I fail to see how belittling Max is going to do anybody --

Alexis: Getting involved with anyone from Sonny's organization could get you killed, or worse, disbarred. Now, is the allure that you feel for this particular brand of bad boy worth losing your career?

Diane: I did not sleep with Max because he is a bad boy. Yes, his line of work is less than desirable, but that does not define him as a human being. He is quite sensitive. He's endlessly sympathetic. He's got boyish good looks. And he's remarkably limber for a man of his size.

Alexis: Yes, I've seen Max's flexibility.

Diane: Max?

Max: Oh, no, no, no, no, never.

Alexis: No, I meant when I walked in, I saw his leg over -- forget it.

Diane: Fine. My point is that there is much more to Max than meets the eye.

Alexis: He carries a gun and his job is to terrorize people.

Max: My job is to protect Sonny.

Alexis: Same thing. Max, can you look me in the eye honestly and tell me that you've never fired a gun at one of Sonny's enemies?

Diane: Don't you answer that.

Alexis: Well, it's a valid question.

Diane: It's entrapment.

Max: No, it's okay, Ms. Miller. I've got nothing to hide. Well, if someone were to make an attempt on Sonny's life, I would stop at nothing to protect him, hypothetically speaking, of course.

Diane: Good boy!

Alexis: Bad boy. I know how this works. You find yourself finding something decent and caring about this otherwise dangerous criminal, you go to bed with him and then the next thing you know, your life is utter chaos. I know, you want to put yourself through this? He's never going to love anyone but Carly.

Max: Oh, no, um...

Max: With all due respect, Ms. Davis, you have no right to judge me or Ms. Miller. It's not like you are the relationship expert. I mean, you married Ric Lansing.

Diane: Max makes an excellent point, and Ric Lansing is only one of the reprehensible men that you have slept with. There's Sonny and Jerry Jacks...

Alexis: I never slept with Jerry Jacks.

Diane: Okay, but you've kissed him.

Alexis: How do you know that? Never mind. It's none of your business.

Diane: Okay, so my relationship with Max is open to your criticism, but I am supposed to respect your privacy and remain mute when you fall apart when Jerry Jacks walks into the room.

Alexis: I do not fall apart.

Diane: Alexis, you are projecting your fear and your doubt, and given your affinity for choosing all the wrong men -- I can't say as I blame you, but I have absolutely no regrets about sleeping with Max.

Max: Likewise, Ms. Miller. Maybe we can do it again some time.

[Diane laughs]

Diane: Now might be a perfect time for you to make that discreet exit.

Alexis: Okay.

Max: Bye-bye.

[Door slams]

Diane: I am so sorry. You're gonna have to -- no -- oh, I'm sorry.

Max: No, I --

Diane: No, go ahead.

Max: I... I just wanted to say thanks. I've never had anyone defend me like that.

Diane: It was my pleasure.

Max: Okay.

Diane: Okay, great. Well, I guess -- I guess I should be --

Max: Yeah.

Diane: I should be going.

Max: Did you see my sock anywhere?

Diane: I, uh, I have not seen your sock, but --

Max: No, thanks, I'll find it.

Diane: Yeah, it's here. Didn't run away.

Max: Yeah, that's right.

Diane: Okay.

Max: Oh, Ms. Miller --

[Max sighs]

Diane: I'll call you.

Max: Yeah.

[Max sighing]

Max: So that happened.