February 19, 2008 Transcript
"You Would Rather Chew Ground Glass
Than Accept My Help, Wouldn't You?"

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Alexis: I said that you could walk us to the car and somehow you've managed to walk us to the door.

Jerry: Well, you can thank me by mixing me a drink while I check the premises.

Alexis: I told you that I don't need your help.

Jerry: I'm not doing this for you; I'm doing this for Kristina. I'm going to find the person who did this to her.


Alexis: "One day there was a storm and a human was thrown from the deck of his ship. Ariel rescued the man, whose name was Prince Eric. She instantly fell in love with him. The evil sea--" let's skip that part. "But Prince Eric bravely steered his ship into Ursula and destroyed the giant sea-witch for good."

[Alexis sighs]

Alexis: "King Triton was proud of Ariel and grateful to Eric for saving his undersea kingdom. He turned the little mermaid into a human and gave them his blessing to marry. They sailed off into the sunset, happy at last."


Jerry: No, no, no, I haven't gone after the deed -- I don't need to. You see, I've got a way to bring the deed to me.


Alexis: Shh. Mac has police posted all over the grounds so you don't need to police the place, and you don't need to escort me anymore anywhere again.

Jerry: Well, as I told you, I --

Alexis: No, don't start telling me that this is all about Kristina because it isn't true.

Jerry: You would rather chew ground glass than accept my help, wouldn't you?

Alexis: Because I don't think you really want to help me. I think that you just want me to be grateful. Wouldn't that be the perfect attorney/client bonanza? That way, I would be obliged to extend my legal services to you, to facilitate whatever morally repugnant schemes that you're trying to pull off.

Jerry: That's ridiculous.

Alexis: Or maybe you're just following me around until I'm desperate enough or overwhelmed enough or lonely enough to turn to you for comfort.

Jerry: And is that such a bad thing, Alexis? Hmm? Come on, Alexis.


[Phone rings]

Ric: It's Alexis -- it's Molly's mother. I told her to call me if there was an emergency.

Marianna: Okay.

Ric: Alexis?

Jerry: No, it's Jerry Jacks.

Ric: What are you doing calling me on Alexis' phone?

Jerry: Because the mother of your little girl is too proud to. She -- she wants to be strong, to manage things on her own.

Ric: Well, Alexis is the acting D.A. right now so if she's having any problems in the department, she's going to have to unfortunately go to Baldwin, all right? I'm dealing with a lot right now.

Jerry: Yes, I know -- Alexis told me you took some time off to do some soul-searching, yeah. How's that going? Any -- any grand revelations?

Ric: I told Alexis to call me if there was an emergency.

Jerry: Well, Kristina, your stepdaughter, saw the face of a serial killer, has gone into a catatonic state. How does that qualify?


Ric: I can't believe this is happening again.

Jerry: I gather from Alexis' discussion with Dr. Winters that Kristina had suffered a similar episode after she saw a man shot.

Ric: Okay -- um -- tell Alexis that we've spoken and that you brought me up to speed. Um -- is Kristina there?

Jerry: Now she's asleep.

Ric: All right -- uh -- well, you tell Alexis to tell Kristina that I'm on my way.

Jerry: I'll do that, yeah.

Marianna: Your stepdaughter, Kristina?

Ric: Yeah, she -- she can't speak, she's not responding. Uh -- it's happened once before. I have to go, she needs me.

Marianna: Of course.