April 5, 2006 Transcript
"There was Another Daughter, in Another Lifetime"

Alexis: Oh -- hi. What are you doing here?

Sam: No, no, no, no, the door! Don't let it -- close. Perfect.

Alexis: It appears that we're locked in here -- together.

Alexis: Hello?

[Knocking]

Alexis: Anybody out there? It's late. I doubt that anybody's here.

Sam: Cell phone? Gee, why didn't I think of that? Yeah, the reception in here is shot.

Alexis: Oh, well. Somebody will be around eventually and they'll see the light under the door, and we won't have to endure each other's company very long at all.

Sam: I wasn't stalking you, if that's what you're --

Alexis: I didn't say anything.

Sam: You don't have to; I can read it on your face. I just -- I mean, I wanted you to know. I was looking for Justus, so I came in here, and then, of course, the door locked.

Sam: Is this yours?

Alexis: Yes, that is. Thank you. I left it here when I met with a client. Thanks.

Sam: I thought it looked familiar.

Alexis: Yeah, Ric’s always chasing me around, looking for everything that I leave behind -- my cell phone, my glasses, my head. I thought you might be able to use these.

Sam: I don't need your tissues.

Alexis: Ok. They'll be right there in case you change your mind. Bad night?

Sam: Don't pretend like you don't know, please?

Alexis: Ok, I won’t. I know that there was another attempt on Sonny's life and I know that it was Emily’s turn to be the innocent victim getting caught in the middle of crossfire, and I know that Jason was arrested for killing the shooter. He got angry and took it out on you.

Sam: Then you certainly know why I might be just a little upset.

Alexis: No, I'm -- I'm sorry, I -- I don’t.

Sam: Please do not start with me right now.

Alexis: I'm just saying that I don't understand why you're so upset. This isn't new. It's not like it never happened before -- in fact, it happens all the time. You should be used to it by now.

Sam: What's your point, Alexis?

Alexis: You're an adult. Act like one. Make another choice, Sam, so you don't have to be so upset all the time. There are a lot of nice guys out there that aren't in the mob, choose one of them. God, I wish Kristina had that same option.

Sam: Ahem.

Alexis: She's stuck in the middle of this, and -- and she doesn't get a vote because she's too little. Nobody will listen to Kristina, but they'll listen to you. You can get out; Kristina can't!

Sam: Why is it always about Kristina with you? Do you ever once give a thought to your other daughter?

Sam: News flash, Alexis -- you have another daughter, but no one would ever know because it's always Kristina this or Kristina that. What about the other child you carried for nine months? Did you even care when she was born? Were you excited to meet her? Were you anxious to see her face? The first time you held her; did you feel anything at all, because it's always about Kristina for you, right? Did you ever stop to consider how doting on one child can make the other feel unwanted, useless, wishing maybe that she had never been born?

Alexis: Listen, you. I have had it up to here with your interminable, baseless accusations about my character. You don't know the first thing about me. Here's a tip -- whatever horrible things you've gone through in your life, I have gone through just as many, probably more because I've lived longer than you. Come to think of it, I'm old enough to be your mother, so show me some damn respect! As for Kristina, I worry about her more because her father is a career criminal. Molly's father, on the other hand, is a respected attorney who uses words and precedents to fight his battles. He is on the right side of the law. Therefore, Molly needs less vigilance and protection. Not that I need to justify myself as a mother to you at all, but I happen to love all of my children equally.

Sam: "All" of your children? You're making it sound like you had more than one. If you had just two, you would say "both of my children."

Alexis: Stop talking for one minute. I'm going to tell you something. Maybe a little honesty, a little painful honesty, might get you to understand and comprehend me just a little teeny bit -- it might even teach you something.

Sam: This ought to be good.

Alexis: There was another daughter, in another lifetime.

Alexis: Sit down. Please. When I was 16 years old, I was in boarding school and I got pregnant. My father had me sent away to give the baby up for adoption.

Sam: What about your baby's father?

Alexis: He never knew. That's the way my father wanted it.

Sam: Did you love him?

Alexis: That's not important.

Sam: What are you saying? Are you saying that your baby wasn't conceived in love? What happened to your baby? Did you even look for her? Did she even matter to you at all?

Alexis: Why do you care?

Sam: You said you wanted me to comprehend you, and I was just thinking maybe if I learned a little bit about your experience, I would learn for myself.

Alexis: You know, this isn't a secret. You can't use this against me. You wanted to know if I ever thought about my daughter after I gave her away? She was the first thought every morning and the last thought every night. I thought about her all the time because I didn't want to give her up. I was not in charge of my life at that time; I was just a kid myself. I wouldn't have been able to support her in any way. And my father would've disowned me if I didn't do what he wanted -- ordered. I don't suppose there's any way that you could ever know this about me, but I was very sheltered and very controlled. I will tell you that there is no way that I would've survived on my own, much less with a kid. So I -- I wrote her -- I wrote her letters that I kept in a box. I knew that they would never get sent, but I -- I wrote them anyway because it somehow kept me connected to her.

Sam: What did you say?

Alexis: I just wrote about feeling guilty, feeling sad. Sometimes I would just write the mundane details of the day.

Sam: When did you stop?

Alexis: When I realized that writing the letters was pointless, that what was done was done, and letter writing really wasn't going to change anything. So I moved on.

Sam: Ahem. Did you ever try and find her? I mean -- um -- you're a woman of many resources -- you're a lawyer, for God's sake.

Alexis: That's exactly why I didn't spend much time looking, because I knew the law, and I also was very aware of my father's thoroughness. So the chances of finding her were minimal at best. When Kristina was sick, I hired someone to look for her. She needed a donor, but there wasn't enough time because she was deteriorating way too fast and, mercifully, your baby saved her.

Sam: So you had no reason to look for the daughter you gave up?

Alexis: Rightly or wrongly, I let go. Ric is the one who brought it up.

Sam: Ric?

Alexis: When he was sick in the hospital, he, I think, was trying to get some perspective on his life and he said to me that he thought I was keeping something from him, something defining. He knew, and out of respect for him, I told him the truth. And the floodgates opened all over again and I haven't been able to stop thinking about her. So I set out to find her.

Sam: So you're looking for your daughter now?

Alexis: Not anymore. She's dead.

[Music plays]

Alexis: She died at the age of 3. She was struck by a car and died at the scene. And now I'm right back where I started, wondering what she looked like, if she has my eyes, she sounds like me -- that sort of thing.

Sam: What if you were wrong?

Alexis: I'm sorry?

Sam: What if your daughter were alive? What would you do?

Singer: Deep down inside ourselves deeper than

Alexis: I would tell her that I'm sorry.

Singer: Scared tonight

[Knock on door]

Man: Hello? I thought I heard voices in here.

Alexis: You're a prince among men.

Guard: Is everybody ok?

Alexis: We're fine. If you could just leave the door open.

Guard: Ok.

Alexis: Maybe loss is more of a common ground than you originally thought.

Singer: You might be everything I dreamed for

Sam: You forgot your glasses, mom.

Singer: Baby, take my hand and hold on