The Convenient Wife
by Kelly

chapter 57

He began to speak, his voice halting. "When I…back when Mike left my
family…when I was just a little kid…I had to watch my mother struggle
every day. Every day, Lex. And she was so…so ashamed of that. So
ashamed that we had to rely on charity from other families. That her
husband took off for parts unknown. She was a beautiful woman, Lex,
and before that she took pride in herself. Walked around with her
head held high. But after that…after Mike left…and then with Deke and
what he did to her…I just…I never saw that pride in my mother's eyes
again. All I saw was shame. Day in. Day out."

He looked onto Alexis's eyes now, his sorrow evident. "It got to me.
It really got to me. And I promised myself…that I'd never make my own
wife suffer like that…never shame her in front of our children like
Mike and Deke did to my mother. And though I made a lot o' mistakes
with Carly, I tried hard never to make THAT one. So…so even though
she hurt Michael and she lied about me to him, I still can't go back
on my vow. I can't get her back through our son. Cuz then all I'd see
is my mother's face…my mother's eyes…looking at me…full of shame."

Alexis breathed in deeply, so affected by his words, so moved that he
had shared his past with her like he used to back when they'd had
implicit trust in each other.

"Thank you," she told him now. "Thank you for explaining all that to
me."

"Shoulda told you in the first place…but today…earlier…I just…didn't
have the words. I get like that. You know."

Alexis smiled softly. "I know. And it's okay. We'll make it past
those times. You forgive me for having too much to say, and I'll
forgive you when you say too little."

"Yin and yang, we fit together," he said, an answering smile on his
lips. "Like this."

He pressed his mouth to hers, kissed her thoroughly, sensually. Until
her knees trembled under her. Until her body heated with an internal
flame. He pulled her body tightly to his as if he craved her
closeness. And that was fine with her, because only in his warmth did
she feel whole and not so alone. She sighed against him, sinking into
his solid strength. For a long time she just enjoyed the closeness
and the quiet with him.

She felt his heart beating against hers and felt so right. She didn't
want to disturb the quiet with turmoil, but she thought of his son
and had to ask the question.

"Did you see Michael? Did you get to talk?"

He nodded against her.

"Was it awful?" she asked.

She felt the shudder that ran through him. "It was…it was terrible.
It tore me apart. But in the end, it was right."

He leaned back to see her eyes. "It was right. I was able to tell him
I loved him and would never stop. And I was able to explain about me
moving on from his mom. He deserved to hear it from me. He
understands now that there's no future for me and Carly."

Alexis nodded, drawing a fingertip along his jaw. "I know that had to
be hard for him to hear…and harder for you to say. But…"

She backed away from him, a small smile on her face. "I have
something that may make you feel a tiny bit better."

She turned and crossed to the dining room table where she grabbed
some papers piled there and returned to him. She brandished them in
front of her body, and he was able to see that they were E-tickets.

"I—uh—I thought the Feds might still have your plane on lock down. So
I got these…for two…round trip to Puerto Rico. For next week."

Sonny stared at them for a moment then lifted his eyes to hers. "Our
honeymoon?"

She shrugged, the smile on her face uncertain, tentative. "I thought…
what better way to prove that I believe you about our future than to
go ahead and get the tickets."

He smiled…just a small one at first…then it grew and grew until it
lit up his handsome face. "I can't believe you, Lexis. You always…you
always surprise me."

"And that's not all you know," she told him. "I called an old friend
of mine, Janie. She's a realtor, and she's got info on the hottest
properties. I thought she could help us find a house when we get
back. A house with lots of rooms so Michael could pick out his own
and keep some of his stuff there. Then he'd always know he has a
place with you."

She thought she saw his smile slip and something she couldn't name
darkened his eyes, but only for a second and then it was gone. She
frowned and wondered at the cause.

"What? Did I say something wrong?"

"No," he whispered, drawing her to him again. "No, not a thing. I
love that idea, baby. Thank you for doing all this. I can't wait."

And Alexis held him to her heart as she envisioned a beautiful future
for their family.

***

The door was opened after only one terse knock. Carly was clearly
surprised to see him standing there. Since their last confrontation,
he hadn't spoken to her. Not once. Which wasn't an easy feat to
manage since he lived just across the hall.

He often popped over to play with the baby or to take Michael to the
park. But he dealt only with Leticia, and said a terse hello and
goodbye to Carly at the most.

He had fully intended to keep it that way until he'd seen the anguish
in Sonny's eyes a little while ago. There was no way Jason could
ignore what she'd done this time. There were things he had to say to
Carly about how she hurt people…things that were so long overdue.

Things he would say today or die trying.

Jason moved past her into the penthouse without a word and stood in
the living room. She followed him, a sullen look on her face.

"I take it you're still on `Mute' when it comes to talking to me,"
she quipped. "If you came to see the boys, they're both napping.
Sorry."

"I wanna see you," he said flatly.

Her eyes grew curious. "What about? It can't be to see how I am since
you haven't cared in forever. It can't be to TALK to me since you
don't do that any more. What's left? Sign language?"

Jason rubbed his forehead wearily. "If you're done with the comedy
routine, can we talk? It's serious."

Carly threw her arms wide in frustration, elbows flailing. "Yeah,
sure, Jase. It's gotta be something serious. You remind me of Sonny.
Always serious. Always morbid. No one's any fun anymore."

He frowned. "Guess it's hard for a man to be fun when you take his
kids away."

She fell silent, her lips parting in surprise. He could see that she
hadn't expected him to know yet. Her eyes darted away and she
couldn't quite meet his intense blue gaze.

"Yeah, he told me," Jason confirmed. "He told me what you said: leave
Alexis or he can't see his boys."

Still looking away, she folded her arms. "So you're here to judge me,
too."

"I don't think you need me to tell you it's wrong. You can't even
look me in the face right now."

Defiantly, she swung her gaze to his, held it for a moment or two,
and then whirled away from him with a disgusted sigh to pour herself
a drink.

Jason watched her for a second, amazed at her reed slim grace. It had
the effect of making a man think she was fragile…tender. But what she
really was was brittle…easily broken. And the shards left behind
after she broke were sharp enough to kill.

"You know what?" she fired, gulping a mouthful of the amber
liquid. "I'm not really in the mood for a sermon right now. So why
don't we just like skip it, `kay?""

"How about for the truth?" he countered. "You in the mood for that
today?"

chapter 58