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The
Road Trip Series Labor Day - September 1, 2003 "I have a bad feeling about this, Doc." "I do too, Luke." Cameron was deep in thought as the plane taxied into position at the Air France terminal at JFK International Airport. He reached into his pocket and worried the small knit bootie between his fingers as he recalled his last conversation with Luke. Drawn to Paris as they searched for Helena, one wild goose chase later they ended up at what had obviously been Alexis's parent's Parisian hideaway. Pictures Alexis showed him of the Cassadine estate in Greece and Wyndemere as well carry the unmistakable burden of oppressiveness, their edifices dark and foreboding and aloof. He viewed the airy welcoming comfort of the apartment off the rue Justine, even with its aging yellowed dust cloths surrounded by the stale scent of abandonment, as an indication of the man Mikkos Cassadine could be and was before it all fell apart, the loss of the woman he loved plunging him forever into a fevered darkness from which he never emerged. He wondered what Helena thought when she walked into that hidden world of muted pastels filled with fine art and books and a bedroom where the warm aura of passionate love still lingered in every corner even after the passing of decades. She probably didn't even flinch, he thought sourly. She'd rifled the safe leaving behind her obscure calling card - one of Kristin's embroidered lace handkerchiefs. Alexis reacted badly and insisted they return to Port Charles. He saw the tiny infant bootie hidden between the pillows and pocketed it before Alexis would notice. If the handkerchief sent a message cloaked in obscurity, the bootie removed all doubt to whom the message was directed. After all Cameron learned during their Paris trip, he knew it was a direct threat against Alexis and her daughter. He glanced at the woman sitting beside him, her dark eyes fixed on the No Electronics sign overhead, its light stubbornly choosing to remain on despite her intense Cassadine glare. Alexis flipped her cellular phone to-and-fro in her hands as she waited impatiently for the sign to turn off so she could call his son. She slept fitfully during the flight back to the United States often mumbling in her sleep as her body trembled from the exhaustion forced on it by her mind. He could not understand what she said but knew from the expression of pained concentration on her face even in sleep hers were not the dreams of innocence. He wanted to hold her in his arms, assure her the demons that gave chase would not win but not even he knew what the next days would bring and it worried him. He reached over to take her hand and she jumped as if jolted by an electric charge. "Alexis, we are almost at the terminal. You'll be able to call Alexander soon." She looked over, apology in her eyes as she entwined her hand in his. "I'm sorry. I'm not exactly the most patient person." He arched a brow in shock. "Nooooooo! You impatient? Never noticed that before." She squeezed his hand and made a face. "Don't be snide. I'm as patient as I can be given who I am existing in what presents itself as my life." "I know you are anxious to check on Kristina and we will but you have to try to be patient even when it goes against your nature." She sighed. "Fine. I've been doing a good many things for well over a year that go against my nature, Cameron, what's one more?" He recognized the distant look in her eyes and knew she was obsessing again on the past, a past that in hindsight she hungered to exorcise but would always remain unchanging, its anguished reality etched in stone. He decided to change the subject. Cameron looked down at her fine-boned hand, marveling how its long elegant fingers laced so perfectly within his and murmured, "You know what's my biggest regret?" Alexis smiled down at their hands and brushed her fingers over his palm. "The day you met me?" "No." Raising his hand, he traced the line of her cheek as he looked up into her dark questioning eyes. "That our time in Paris couldn't be the way it is meant to be, the way all those movies and romance novels paint it." She smiled wistfully at the romance of the thought. "As two lovers caught up only in each other in the cool Parisian night, our lives blissfully happy ever after?" "Yes. Would that be such a terrible thing?" She had no idea why the song drifted into her mind but she needed to address the question posed to her and cloaking her answer in the song of another language seemed to be the only means of revealing what was in her heart while still allowing it to remain hidden, her defense against the fear of wanting and never having that still holds her hostage. Soft as a whisper, she began to sing. Des
yeux qui font baiser les miens, Quand
il me prend dans ses bras Il
me dit des mots d'amour, Il
est entre dans mon coeur C'est
lui pour moi. Moi pour lui Et
des que je l'apercois Des
nuits d'amour a ne plus en finir Quand
il me prend dans ses bras Time stood still for him as her voice, smoky as bourbon and branch on a sultry summer night, danced along the melody teasing it into the air. Deeply touched, he wasn't certain if the feeling was due to the haunting melody or the intimate look in her warm eyes as she sang to him. "Quite lovely coming from the woman who swears she sings like a strangled cat. I've heard that song before…" Cameron said, a quizzical frown gracing his forehead. "La Vie an Rose." He recalled the song and was interested to see what she would say. "Except for some rudimentary phrasing and a few colorful curses I don't speak French all that well. Care to translate for me?" She knew the sentiment of the lyrics very well but did not want to reveal the heart of the song to him, a heart that revealed too much of her own at a time in her life when there really was no place for sentiment and love regardless of how much she craved it. She decided to fudge a bit and shrugged. "The French language loses something in the translation but in this case there isn't much to say except it is a song about living life looking through rose-colored glasses." Cameron's interest was piqued by her very offhand explanation. "I could have sworn someone said it spoke of love." "Yes, but why dwell on love since the rose-colored glasses once removed bring you back rather swiftly to reality." She thought of how she once looked at Sonny, her rose-colored glasses ripped off finally to reveal the stark reality of who he was and who he sadly would never allow himself to be. She shrugged and said dismissively, "Besides, it's just a song and silly of me to show off and sing to you. " "But isn't it a good thing sometimes to put on the misty-colored spectacles if only for a little while when reality becomes too overwhelming? The American Psychiatric Association would probably pull my license for thinking outside this particular box but I think it might be quite therapeutic - if used in moderation." "Sorry, Cameron, but for a Cassadine the rose-colored glasses were stripped away a very long time ago and there are no happily ever afters," Alexis sighed as she gently removed her hand from his and replaced it in her own lap, a small gesture of distancing not lost on Cameron. With that she turned her head to look out the window, subject closed. She could sense Cameron studying her as she gazed out at the busy airport. The words of the song kept running through her mind, she so much wanted to catch them and make them real with Cameron but the obstacles to so many things in her life never seem to end and fear always lurked just around the corner. Eyes
that make mine look down When
he takes me in his arms Nights
of love that never end The plane taxied to a stop and powered down as the No Electronics sign finally went dark. Alexis moved her thumb to the speed dial when Cameron suddenly reached out to stop her. She jerked back in annoyance. "Cameron, what the hell are you doing? I need to call Zander." He pointed to the phone. "Check the display, Alexis." She checked the display and it read, "NO SIGNAL". She shook it briskly like a Christmas snowglobe, checked it closely from every angle again and saw the same message. A look of utter frustration blanketed her face as she continued to stare the phone down as if trying to will it into service. Cameron knew that expression and decided an explanation was needed before she did something they'd both regret. "The new security protocols at all the metro airports. The debarkation and customs areas are all shielded against cellular and microwave interference. A signal can't get through the grid. You'll have to wait until we pass customs and reach the main terminal. I'm sorry, I thought you knew." Alexis let out an exasperated sigh and dropped the cellular in her purse as they stood to disembark. "It's always something." They were processed quickly through customs and caught the shuttle from the International terminal to JetBlue's terminal further into the airport. Alexis continued to check her cellular display for signs of life as they walked along the crowded concourse toward the passenger check-in area. He passed a Starbucks, turned to ask her if she wanted a vanilla latte and noticed she was no longer beside him. He turned sharply around and caught sight of her standing in front of one of the small boutiques that line the terminal concourse, her forehead touching the icy window. He walked over to look into the shop window and his eye immediately rested upon the stuffed lamb with a pale lavender ribbon tied around its neck, a would-be sister to Kristina's beloved Lambie-Pie nestled among the multitudes of stuffed toys. Tears pooled in her eyes as she looked up into his with such heartbreak that he felt her pain sear his heart. It seemed everything reminded her of what she lost, even a simple stuffed animal. He put his arm around her and pulled her to him. "Well, looks like Lambie-Pie has a sister." She shook her head negatively as she pulled away to stand near one of the large columns. She looked at the cellular as she fought the tears from falling and muttered "Finally!" as she pushed the speed dial. She tapped her nails against the column as it rang and he picked up. "Zander, its Alexis." "Hey, what's up? Are you still in Paris?" His voice sounded faint as the cellular crackled. "No, we are at JFK. Is everything alright with Kristina?" Zander shouted. "What? Alexis I can't hear you! What did you say?" She raised her voice. "I said is Kristina okay?" "Alexis, this is a very bad… con..." And with that the phone went dead. "Damn!" she growled as she banged her cell against the column and watched silently as the flip top went flying in one direction, the cracked battery pack in another. She looked down angrily at what remained of her cellular phone as a deep voice intoned, "I think I'll dial this time" as Cameron calmly handed over his phone to her upon hearing Zander's voice. Alexis took a calming breath. "Zander, the connection is not good so listen up. Is everything okay with Kristina?" "Yeah, she's fine." "Are you sure? Have you noticed anything… strange?" He laughed. "Are you kidding? You're talking the house of Q here, always something weird going on." "Zander…" she said between gritted teeth. He heard the tension in her voice and started to pay attention. "No, everything is fine. I kinda took Alice into my confidence, about watching over the munchkin for you while you are away and she's been extra watchful. She really loves Kristina and thinks you got a raw deal so she's on your side. And think about it… who's stupid enough to try anything with Alice around?" She smiled uncertainly. "No, I guess you're right. She's a pretty formidable woman, not to mention that death grip hug." "Let's not reminisce about your wild male side, Alexis. I still have nightmares about that kiss you shared with my Dad. I've spent time with Kristina everyday and kept her amused with stories." Cameron could see her spine loosen as Alexis started to relax. He was just a bit jealous of the calming effect his son had on her. She chuckled softly. "What kind of stories? Not more of your outrageous tales, I hope." "No, just a little family history. Told her all about how her Mommy saved me and took me in and tried to kill me with kindness and an oversupply of popcorn." "Zander!" she put her hand over her mouth as she laughed. "Nah, I told her how her Mommy found something good in me that was buried so deep I forgot it existed and made me face who I am and what I was doing to myself. I told her how brave and kind and generous she is and how lucky she is to have a parent who loves her so completely she would do anything for her." Alexis glanced up at Cameron who was watching her. She smiled nervously and was happy he did not hear the subtle insult aimed in his direction in his son's last statement. "I hope you kept some of the more graphic stories about you and her Mommy to yourself." "Yeah, she's too young for the gory details. Being she's your daughter, I figure she'll be ready by the age of seven for those." "You are absolutely wicked! So, back to business. We are at JFK and should back in PC by 6:00p this evening. Please keep watch on her, Zander. We had some trouble in Paris." "Are you alright?" he asked with concern and moment later more haltingly, "Is my Dad ok?" "Yes, we are both fine but we had a visitor and she left us a rather cryptic message." 'Visitor? Message? What do you mean?" "Helena." "Okaaaaay…now I understand. Don't worry, I'll watch over the munchkin until you get back. No one will try to harm her with Big Alice and me watching over her. Can I tell Alice about this?" "I trust her, Zander. I am barred from the house and from my daughter so please tell her everything and how important it is for her to be on watch against anything that seems out of the ordinary - a deliveryman, a new employee, anyone or anything that seems suspicious. If she needs to reach me, she has all the numbers." "I've watched her with Kristina, Alexis, and she is very protective. I know that when I lay it out for her, she'll be onboard." Alexis chuckled. "Looks like you two have become pretty chummy. Since she struck out with Dobson, maybe she found someone she likes better - and is at least reasonably certain is a man." "Alexis!" "Ok, ok, calm down, just a joke. We'll see you soon. Do you want to talk to your Father?" She hoped he would say yes but was disappointed. "Nah, I'll see him when you get back. But, Alexis…" "Yes, Zander?" "Tell him…" "Tell him what?" She could hear the hesitation in his voice. "Tell him I'm glad he was there with you. " And with that the line went dead. It wasn't much but it was a start. They both had to feel their way toward each other and Alexis knew it would take time. She could feel Cameron's hand rubbing her back and she leaned back into him, her tense muscles soothed by his touch and the feel of his body next to hers. She finally handed him back the phone and moved away to pick up her suitcase. "Everything is fine so far. Zander said there has been nothing out of the ordinary." Cameron looked relieved. "That is good news. Perhaps we were wrong and she got whatever she was looking for in that safe in Paris and now she's long gone." She looked into his eyes. "Even if she did, she wouldn't allow that to get in the way of the perverse enjoyment she gets from torturing me. I wish I knew what was in that safe and why she wanted it so badly. I have some papers I found there when I went to the apartment two years ago, maybe there is some information hidden in them. Mikkos was obsessive about organization so I imagine there must be an inventory list somewhere no doubt in some ancient Sanskrit code. But, make no mistake, as long as Helena is wandering around without a leash, Cameron, we are all in danger." * * * The next weeks passed slowly for Alexis as they all had since the last day of the trial when her world crumbled about her. She desperately searched for ways to fill the hours that dragged on from one day to another. Deciding against visiting the gym after her last experience and after a creative stab at painting made Cameron question her hand-eye coordination she took up sculpting and found she was quite good at it. She set up a pottery wheel in the guest bedroom and it became her blessed haven. She found the world of clay and wheel to be the one place where she felt free enough to cast aside her need to control life around her and just lose herself in the moment. She embraced the tactile world of the clay, poking and prodding until it formed her subconscious vision, her mind drifting to thoughts and hopes and dreams she otherwise buried for safekeeping and the hours passed more quickly. She soon had a selection of pieces ready to be fired in the potter's kiln and found a sense of accomplishment she thought was lost forever. She gave Cameron a vase and he surprised her by returning it filled with fresh summer flowers. She protested it was his but he asked her to keep it for him until he found a new apartment worthy of its grace. Every three days, a florist box would appear on her doorstep with a new arrangement of flowers for the vase. It was a part of him with her all the time, its scent filling her home and the sentiment behind it her heart. She read law journals and researched children's issues, organized files and reviewed case law to prepare for the day when her license was reinstated. For months she convinced herself that she would never again be the successful woman she had been but Cameron would not allow her to even imagine a life without her career. He urged her not to give up, that she needed to fight to get back what was hers and, in addition to her daughter, that included her career. She was barred from her daughter but Alice, God bless her, called every day with an update on her daughter's life. She often held the phone to Kristina's ear as her Mother talked to her endlessly of the future, of the life they would make together, of the room filled with dancing bears, a menagerie of stuffed animals and the mobile made of lambs that awaited her. She spoke of the picnics they would have by the lake, of jumping into mountains of leaves in autumn and the snow angels they would make when the world was blanketed with white. She shared her dreams with the child of her heart and Alice always assured that the first voice Kristina heard in the morning and the last at night was that of her Mother. She was grateful but for Alexis it would never be enough. Oddly the threat from Helena receded into the background during those days and Alexis felt relaxed in spite of herself. Cameron spent as much time with Alexis as he could and saw she was more worried about how she filled her hours than truly living them. He was still regretting Luke's interruption of their lovemaking in Paris and how it seemed to return them to a holding pattern, the same pattern they had been in since he took his heart, slapped it on his sleeve and kissed her the first time. They went to lunch, took walks and had picnics in the park and talked endlessly about every subject that came to mind but the intimacy they captured in that hideous room in Paris seemed to have faded and they were back to the same bickering-bantering relationship. He wanted more and he was determined to make her want it too. He
leaned back on the couch in his living room and dialed the phone.
"Alexis, hi. Seeing as today is Labor Day and as both of us
are laboring-not, I thought we could get out of town for dinner
and a little relaxation away from PC. How does that sound?" "No, I have somewhere else in mind." A little disappointed, she replied. "Okay." He almost jumped for joy. "Great! I'll be by around 7:00pm." The happiness in his voice was contagious and she grinned. "What shall I wear?" "I know what I'd like to say but I believe there are laws in New York State against that kind of non-dress code." She laughed out loud and for Cameron it was his favorite symphony. "So… if I must be clothed…" He pouted. "Must you?" "Yes, as you pointed out we would not want to run afoul of the law." "Then… casual." "Casual it is…see you later." * * * They drove out of town and the landscape changed slowly from farmland filled with ripe corn and earthy potatoes to lakes of azure blue and finally to dense forests, the late summer rains coloring their palette in deep dusky green as nature holds its breath awaiting the time to change colors and dance. Alexis looked around as they drove along and turned to Cameron. "Ah, Cameron? Just where is this great restaurant? I'm having flashbacks to Easter and the times you kidnapped me to the forest and hills and dales and Canada." "I do seem to do that quite a bit, don't I?" He smiled wickedly remembering melted chocolate and a paintbrush, making love under a starlit sky, his heart surrounding hers and never wanting to let go. She laughed and raised an eyebrow. "Yes, you do. Not that I'm complaining but it seems everywhere you take me is out in the wilderness." "Well, this isn't the wilderness - just a bit farther out of town than usual. But you are gonna LOVE it!" She went back to watching the scenery. "I hope you know where you are headed because I think I just saw that white rock again." He chuckled and recalled their first road trip looking for Easter Egg supplies when he drove Alexis and Kristina around in circles for hours just so he could spend more time alone with them. Alexis caught him out and that day ended better than he ever could have hoped. Alexis saw neon lights ahead and started to shake her head when they pulled into the parking lot - if you could call it that - of an old tumbledown building. The neon sign merely proclaimed "BAR" which Alexis looked upon as a bad omen when ownership declined the privilege of adding their name to the advertising. The building looked like Abe Lincoln's log cabin run amok as extensions were added with no thought to aesthetics or, from her practiced eye, safety and she wouldn't be surprised if the building would fall at the next brisk breeze or visit from the Big Bad Wolf. The parking lot was filled with trucks, vans and what seemed to Alexis an overabundance of motorcycles. She pointed to the ramshackle building and asked, "THAT is where we are having a nice, relaxing intimate dinner?" He grinned at the look of snooty horror on her face as he moved to open his door. "Yep." Cameron walked around the car, opened the door and held her hand to step out. She looked at the bar, glanced at Cameron and shook her head. "You brought me to a country and western bar?" He grinned slyly. "It's not country - exactly. I like to think of it as an eclectic venue." She nodded as if that was the perfect explanation. "Oh." They walked hand in hand up the gravel path strewn with cigarette butts, the remnants of someone's practice of safe sex and some chewed up brown stuff Alexis did not want to have explained. Just then, two men hurtled through the wooden door and rolled down the steps to land with a thud at Alexis's feet. They stumbled to their feet and the punches started in earnest as Alexis attempted to sidestep quickly away to avoid becoming their unwilling referee. She looked up at Cameron who was attempting half-heartedly to stifle a grin. "Eclectic, huh?" He nodded happily. They walked through the doors and Alexis jaw dropped. The place was filled with a collection of people not unlike one would find in a circus sideshow or Times Square on New Year's Eve. Cowboys in hats and boots, even some with spurs, a group of women with hair the color of the rainbow and various pierced body parts, and a group of men - no doubt the owners of the motorcycles - with tattoos surrounded by leather, dark aviator glasses and bulging biceps that could crush a beer can with one upper arm. Alexis couldn't see anything or anyone else in the gloomy darkness except for the disco ball in the center of what served as the dance floor, its mirrored surface gleaming as it twirled wildly. It was like an LSD hallucination and she was right in the middle of it. She looked down at her designer pants, silk blouse and Jimmy Choo heels and then at Cameron's black Western shirt, black jeans and boots and rolled her eyes. "I seem to be a tad underdressed - either my cowboy hat or leather jacket appears to be missing." Cameron looked her up and down causing her to squirm slightly. "You look ravishing, just right." She smirked at him. "An eclectic venue? I'd love to take a peek into your…" He retorted with a wicked grin. "Peeking, Alexis? You don't seem the voyeuristic type. Perhaps we should discuss this predilection of yours." She rolled her eyes that were starting to smart in the smoke-filled gloom. "Peek… into your dictionary of definitions. From the look of this eclectic assortment of characters, I need to upgrade my Merriam-Webster." He put his arm around her and pulled her to his side. "Just look at it as an adventure in dining." She turned her head just as a loud belch from the rather hairy looking man at the bar landed in her face. "Such a charming establishment, such winning clientele. You really expect me to eat here?" Cameron was amused. "I know it may not pass the royal Russian white glove test but they have the best ribs outside of Texas." "Ribs?" "And karaoke." She whistled. "A floor show? Wow, that just makes it so worth the trip. And by the way, do I want to know why my $400 shoes are sticking to the floor?" He threw back his head and laughed. "Loosen up Alexis - live a little." They were seated at the table next to the right sidewall and that proved to be a blessing in disguise since the people dancing to the pulsing music, most of them quite inebriated, tended to twirl off the pseudo-dance floor and end up in the patrons' laps. Cameron ordered the beer on tap, which Alexis thought mighty brave considering the health inspector probably drove right past the joint. He ordered them four orders of ribs, two orders of hot wings and hush puppies. Alexis crinkled her nose. "The only hush puppy I know is a shoe but then again it would fit right in with all the gastronomic delights of this fine dining establishment." "A
hush puppy is a deep-fried mix of flour, cornmeal, egg, buttermilk
and onion shaped like a ball." I've
got something to tell you He
walked off the stage and worked his way toward her as he sang. I've
got a thing about you baby Alexis
was frozen in place as the lone spotlight that followed him found
its way to illuminate her as he reached the table. She hid her face
in her hands but he grasped both of her hands in one of his and
knelt before her. Ain't
it just like a woman He
sang as if they were the only two people in that room and when he
finished he kissed her hand and walked back to the stage. The bar
went wild, the crowd hooting and hollering and stomping its feet.
They clamored for more and he laughed as he bowed and blew them
kisses. Motorcycle mamas and cowboys rushed to hug Alexis and slap
her back as she stared over at Cameron being congratulated by a
crowd of well-wishers. She
was totally flabbergasted - and very turned on. Cameron
strode back through the crowd, threw down a wad of bills on the
table, took her hand and they walked out as cheers still rang in
their ears. They
walked to the car and he opened her door. Alexis shook her head
negatively and crooked a finger his way. He reached her and she
grabbed him and kissed him with all the fiery abandon he built within
her. She reached behind and opened up the back door, shoved him
inside as she jumped in beside him and closed the door. "Alexis,
I can't drive from the back seat." She
pushed him down on his back and laid her body on top of his. "Who
said you were going to be the one in the driver's seat tonight?" Back to The Road Trip Series Index
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