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The
Quiet Before the Storm
by bcandylandgirl
Part
3
Sonny
made his way through the familiar halls of General Hospital. Moving
like a man with an important mission in mind. Nodding and winking
at the familiar faces of nurses he saw regularly, he noticed them
blush at him from behind the nurses station. He smiled the
smile he puts on for the world for a brief moment. No one knew that
he hadnt shared his true smile, dimples all ablaze in public
in many months. The only person he felt comfortable enough with
to let his guard down and show his true feelings to was that of
the person he was going to visit.
Reaching
the end of the hallway he made eye contact with the man in the shadows,
nodding the ok sign in reply. He took a deep breath
before entering the room. Quietly closing the door behind him he
made his way to the bassinet containing his baby girl. Picking her
up he could see the excitement in her eyes. Speaking softly to her
he smiled at her toothless and dimple filled grin, Hey princess.
Hows daddys little girl doing today?
Cameron,
gaining his composure now found the ability to speak. Opening the
door wider to let her in. Alexis, its good to see you.
Prompt as always I see.
Looking
around the room Alexis replied, Well, you know me. I just
want this nightmare to be over. The sooner we start, the sooner
I can leave.
Alexis
Seeing
his look of hurt, she explains herself. Cameron, you know
I dont mean it that way. Pacing the room she continues
as if speaking to herself, Its just that you know I
hate even talking about this anymore. Im getting better. Im
keeping track of my time and other than some strange dreams it seems
like Kristina is almost gone. I can account for every hour of the
day. Now my sleeping hours not so much, but who can really take
notes on sleeping patterns unless they are not actually asleep or
are only half asleep in which case you cant really qualify
it as sleeping and
Alexis,
he said, cutting off her rant. Breathe.
Hey
my girl. You like that dont you? Sonny said in a singsong
voice, grinning widely as he talked to his princess. The last round
of tummy kisses he bestowed upon a giggling Kristina left her breathless
and content.
Moving
towards the rocking chair in the room he sat down, bringing his
daughter into his lap to have one of their now famous daddy-daughter
talks. As he handed his daughter her favorite stuffed animal that
he had given to her, a small baby chick, she immediately grabbed
onto it, hugging it to her little chest as she snuggled against
her daddys warm body. Eyes slightly closed, readying
for her afternoon nap.
You
know Kristina, I love you soo much. And it kills me everyday that
I come to see you that I have to hide the fact that Im your
father. I mean its great that I can see you regularly now,
but I cant stop wishing that I could take you home with me.
That you, your mother and I could be a family. But I know thats
not possible right now. Your mother still hates me. I guess I cant
blame her. I wasnt there for her when she needed me. But I
want you to know that I never once stopped loving your mother. I
did what was best for the both of you at the time. Things were crazy,
and I needed to be away from you both to keep you safe. I hope that
one day youll be able to understand that.
Kristina
looked up at him with an angelic smile as if she understood. Grasping
his thumb in her tiny little fist, she settled down once again into
her daddys arms, drifting off to sleep.
I
only hope that one day I will be able to tell your mother why I
did what I did. But who knows if the time will come? Shed
have to be willing to stay in the same room as me for us to talk,
and I dont see that happening any time soon. But I know Ive
got to do something. You wont be here in the hospital forever
Kristina. Soon enough I wont have the option of stationing
Johnny nearby to let me know when Alexis is around so I will know
whether or not I can sneak in here and see you without her knowing.
Once your mom is able to take you home, Im pretty sure shell
notice a 6 foot man standing outside her door, he said with
a weak laugh. Without divine intervention I cant see any way
for me to get her OR you back. But I promise you, whenever you or
your mother really need me, Ill be there. No questions asked.
Kissing her silky head he closed his eyes and rocked her now sleeping
form, content to be able to hold someone that he loved and who loved
him, close to his heart.
Alexis
Alexis,
Cameron said while waving a hand in front of her face. Are you still
there?
Shaking
her head from her far away thoughts she remembered where she was.
Letting out a small nervous laugh she looked away from Cameron.
Not wishing to discuss where her thoughts had led her. Especially
not wanting to discuss whom she was thinking about. The man who
haunted her dreams every night lately.
Im
fine Cameron. Its still me, Alexis. I was just daydreaming.
Dont get too excited, I still believe thats an activity
normal people experience. I may still have Kristina running around
in my head sometimes, but I can still function on my own without
her sometimes, she said. Embarrassment covering her face as
she tried to deflect.
Laughing
at the blush that crept across her face, he decided to see where
this lead.
Where
did you go on me Alexis?
Oh,
it was nothing. Its just that I havent heard someone
tell me to breathe in a long time.
Sounds
like something worth delving into Alexis. Who was this person? They
sound like they meant a great deal to you. Already knowing
the answer, he asked her anyway. He may not know the mans
name, since Alexis never told him. But he did know the back-story.
She had told him once about the man, but had never given any pertinent
details as to who he was. No specifics at all. But he did know what
the man had done to her when he left her for another woman, feeling
broken and rejected. The stupidity of this man to leave Alexis for
anyone else still left him dumbfounded as always. Trying his best
to be helpful, he smiled, though he wanted to lash out for the injustice
he felt. She longs for a man who rejected her, but I want
her! Just as she is. But I know its not enough. She has to
want me too. All of me. But I know Im not what she wants.
This was not a subject he himself wanted to get into with Alexis,
but he knew he had to. This is about helping her. Not pushing
her to think about this will only hurt us both in the end. Whoever
it is, she loves him. This I know is true.
Standing
up from the couch, Alexis moved to the window, staring out at the
setting sun. Cameron noticing this, waited for her to answer. He
knew she was distancing herself. He knew she could hide her feelings
if her back was to him. He could always read her thoughts just by
looking into her eyes. What use to be a mystery to him, was now
like an open book. Anyone could read her and tell what she was thinking,
what she needed, and what she wanted. If only they cared enough
to try. She was much more fragile than people gave her credit for.
Her best defense mechanisms were to appear distant and calculated
or to simply joke herself out of uncomfortable situations with her
savvy Alexis Davis Attorney at Law wit and infallible
banter. He would let her do neither of these things right now. The
matter needed to be discussed, and right now.
After
giving her a few moments to collect her thoughts, he was about to
broach the subject again when he was interrupted by her soft voice,
as she looked sadly out of the window.
I
was thinking about my babys father.
part
4
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