Her
legs threatened to give out from under her as she collapsed onto
the bench. She felt as if she'd been running a marathon, out of
breath yet filled with an overabundance of oxygen at the same time.
The excess made her giddy as the emptiness underlying it forced
her to gasp in despair. Just as her daughter filled her life to
the brim, her empty arms threatened to choke her heart.
Emptiness in the midst of plenty, she thought sadly, a
life's history come full circle.
The foghorn out in the harbor sang out its mournful dirge as wisps
of white drifted to shore off the water, their smoky tendrils dancing
like Salome before her King, dropping their veil not to entice but
to conceal the aloneness of the night. The air was tangy, textured
on her skin and she closed her eyes and licked her lips to taste
the salt. She sat motionless until she heard the buoy bell ring
a warning to those who would venture out to risk the perils that
await them on the darkened sea.
A ringing reminder of the dangers of coming too close to where comfort
and solace await, a place where the unwary are cast upon the rocks,
their bones left to be ravaged by the creatures of the air as they
bleach ghostly white in the sun.
Rocks and shoals, she pondered, the tides of my life always
too low to navigate to a safe haven.
She looked out into the darkness beyond the fog to lights burning
in the windows of the family haven, a place where she did not fit
and was not wanted except to do the bidding of others, the beckoning
warmth of lights and family merely an illusion.
I can no longer be who I am, she mourned, for life has
made me no longer what I was.
She reached into her pocket and held up the chain that, while no
longer worn, always draped her soul. She gazed with fascination
at the medallion as it spun around in the soft light of the dock,
each turn in the night a nail being driven into the coffin of her
heart.
"Thank you for saving my life."
"I doubt it was at risk but you're welcome."
"And thank you for saving our future."
"Are you the only person on this earth I can trust?"
I was that person for you, my brother, she cried tears into her
mind, but tonight you have become Judas, the betrayer.
The medallion glinted its unspoken message as she stared into the
night.
"You are one of us until death."
Tonight, she thought with a heavy heart, death has cast
its shadow upon me.
Alexis continued to stare at the Island unseeing, the necklace gripped
in her fist as the chain marked and tore her skin, mourning amidst
a shower of silent tears as the death cart carrying her brother
passed from her life into eternity.
Tonight she lost her battle and her brother and was never more alone
than at any moment in her life.
* * *
He watched her silently from the shadows as she stared out into
the distance. She hadn't moved for nearly an hour, sitting slumped
on a bench that overlooked the harbor and the Island. He took the
opportunity to study without her knowledge, knowing how she hated
to be ogled and stared at, her prickly defenses always at the ready
to face the unwanted and often unknown opponent and beat them verbally
into submission.
He did not like what he was seeing.
He'd seen her many moods. Terrified as she feared for her daughter's
life in NICU, charming as she rambled the night he met her surrounded
by those less fortunate who later could not stop talking about the
beautiful angel who stopped by and visited their world, sly as she
fooled him and the world into thinking she was mad, angry so many
times they disagreed seemingly about everything and everyone. He'd
seen her dejected by the events in her life she could not control,
devastated by losing custody of her daughter, determined to fight
the world and him to get her back but up until this moment, he had
never before seen Alexis Davis destroyed.
As he looked at the woman who has come to hold a special place in
his heart, he himself was devastated by what he saw. Something very
bad had happened and he knew by her body language she was reaping
the cost. He only needed to look into her eyes to confirm it.
He walked over to make himself known and spoke softly so not to
frighten her. "Alexis?"
She gave no sign of being aware of his presence next to her.
He spoke just as gently but reached out and touched her shoulder.
"Alexis?"
She didn't even flinch.
He knelt down in front of her and looked into dark eyes that had
been stripped of all warmth and light, only coldness and devastation
remained and his breath caught in his throat.
He placed his hands on her face and moved her head to face his.
"Alexis, its Cameron. What happened?"
Her eyes shifted slightly and finally looked into his, her eyes
filled with an aching sadness that brought tears to his eyes.
He repeated the question as he shook her gently. "Alexis, what
happened? Is Kristina alright?"
At her daughter's name a small tear slipped from her eye and she
took a deep breath. "I've lost her, Cameron, and worse yet
I've lost myself."
She turned her head back to watch the Island.
He noticed her hand grasping the necklace he saw her holding up
when he watched her. He saw droplets of blood on the bench where
the chain had cut into her palm and he tried to pry the necklace
from her hand but she just gripped it tighter.
"Alexis, what are you holding? It looks like a necklace."
She looked down and stared at her hand as if seeing a ghost. She
slowly unclenched her hand and the necklace fell through the slats
of the bench to the ground. He picked it up and recognized the crest
that Nikolas wears on his ring. But this was obviously made for
a woman, more delicate but just as imposing.
"Is this your family crest?"
"It is my family curse. You wear it to signify you are a member
of the family, that you are sworn to uphold all that is Cassadine
until the day you die."
"I've never seen you wear this, Alexis."
"I stopped wearing it a long time ago, even after I was brought
back from exile and it was returned to me. I believed I had outgrown
it, become better then what it signifies but now I realize it was
never really mine to wear at all."
Cameron was confused. "I don't understand."
She sighed and finally looked at him. "Tonight I found out
my brother betrayed me. The brother that took care of me when I
could not care for myself, who helped me find a road to walk in
life that was my own, who stood by me when everyone abandoned me,
kissed my cheek and betrayed me like Judas. Only the price of betrayal
was not thirty pieces of silver, it was my daughter's life."
He knew this was about Stefan's machinations. Cameron had met him
briefly and was left cold. He'd looked into his eyes, the mirror
to what lies within, and saw only avarice and slyness and calculation.
He was as different from his sister as dark is from light and that
is how he saw them, the man who lurks amid shadows and the woman
who tries to shine light into darkness. He disagreed vehemently
with Alexis about trusting her brother knowing what lengths he would
go to attain his goal, even to destroying an innocent life - whether
that be Ned or a Summer Holloway. He knew that Alexis was not comfortable
with her brother's plans because she refused to look him in the
eye, the emotional bond they'd built so connective they read each
other only too well. The terrible price of her trust had come home
to roost and it rocked her to the core.
He put the necklace in her lap and took her hands in his. She was
shivering both from the cold and from what happened tonight with
her brother and he wanted to hold her and warm her and help.
"Alexis, tell me what happened. I want to help."
She laughed sourly. "Help? I thought you washed your hands
of me. I recall you saying you couldn't countenance what my brother
would do to Ned and you wanted no part of it, not even to know what
was planned. You raked me over the coals about my morals and my
ethics and how was I going to live with myself knowing I could have
stopped it. Well, I tried to stop Stefan but it was too late. So,
my friend, you got your wish. Ned has been arrested for rape of
a young girl and I know he did not do it. He will be ruined unless
the truth comes out and I can't help him because my brother informed
me tonight that he created a paper trail that leads right back to
yours truly. So, unless I defend my brother and get him acquitted
of murder, he will see to it my part in this is made public and
I will lose my daughter, his niece, forever. And for the record,
just as you arrogantly predicted, I have no self-respect left."
Cameron was stunned, not by her admission of guilt over what she
set in motion but that her own brother set her up.
Alexis continued, "Tonight I saw a man that life over the past
few years had, when I wasn't looking, somehow changed from good
to evil. My brother was wily and manipulative like all the Cassadines,
me included, but there was always a basic goodness and fairness
to him. There was an air about him when he returned, a cold bitter
wind that chilled me to the bone and it was disconcerting. When
I looked at him I still saw the boy who protected me from Helena
and Stavros, who brought me books to read when Helena would not
allow me to be schooled, who saw who I was and made me feel special
even as others saw me as a flawed intruder. That man of memory is
my brother. The man I saw tonight, who threatened me with my daughter,
was a stranger wearing a mask of evil."
He could see what happened between her and Stefan was tearing her
apart. A lifetime of trust and love was shattered.
He sat down next to her. "Look, I'm sorry I was so tough on
you. I saw you floundering and refusing the life jacket I was offering
and it made me angry. You are so damn stubborn, Alexis! You are
such a brilliant mind I'm in awe of you but you have been making
decisions based on your emotions over the last year and those can
never be trusted completely."
She smiled softly. "I trusted you completely on gut instinct.
I guess that was wrong too, huh?"
He was taken aback for a moment and then chuckled. "Well, there
are exceptions to every rule and I like to think I'm one of them.
I know you are desperate to get your daughter back. Hell, you masqueraded
as a man for weeks knowing you'd get caught at some point but the
woman they tell me is the savviest lawyer in the East would not
be shooting from the hip this way. You have cracked far tougher
nuts than this and won with your smarts and legal savvy. You need
to start thinking objectively even where your daughter is concerned.
Devise your strategy and follow it through to conclusion."
"You are sounding more like a lawyer than a shrink. You're
not holding out on me are you?"
"No, just simple chess strategy. I want to help you - if you
want me too. We can work through this together and find a solution.
Two brains are better than one, right? Your brother may be smart
and cover his tracks but everyone makes a mistake and given the
pressure your brother seems to be under he was bound to have made
a mistake somewhere along the line. We need to smoke out the errors
in judgment, level the playing field and show that brother of yours
what happens when he messes with you. Do we have a deal?"
She glanced at him with hope in her eyes for the first time since
she walked out of the PCPD. She knew Cameron was right - Stefan
was working on his own with paid assassins and scammers and in doing
so was breaking his own family code - unless you are family, you
can't be trusted. Darius found out the price of her brother's employment
and Alexis knew Cindy would be next. Relying on outside subcontracting
showed a chink in Stefan's armor and they would find a way to exploit
it.
When she left him tonight, she felt a stranger to her own family.
Now, the mask was ripped off and she knew what she must do. Turn
back all the Cassadine treachery and rules of engagement onto her
brother, her nephew a casualty if necessary, to get back everything
that is hers. There was no turning back but that did not frighten
her. She stood stronger without her family because for the first
time in a very long time she was not alone.
Cameron arched a brow as he caught her staring at him with a smile.
"You seem to have come to a decision."
She stood up and held out her hand. He stood and she drew him over
to the edge of the dock. She looked out at the Island for a moment
and then at the necklace that she held in her hand. She closed her
eyes and tossed the necklace into the water. It floated in lazy
circles farther and farther down until it disappeared.
He was puzzled as he studied the satisfied expression on her face.
"Interesting move."
She smiled gently as she looked into the water. "I don't need
a medallion to know who I am."
He hugged her and kissed her cheek as they walked along the dock
to home.
