Losing Balance
by Lionel

chapter 36

As the limousine pulled away from the courthouse with Mike at the wheel, Alexis sat in the backseat gripping her cell phone in one hand and balancing her open address book in her lap. She rifled through the book with her free hand, tearing several pages in her urgent search for a cell phone number for Carly, for any number that didn't go through Sonny or Lorenzo.

Alexis needed to reach Carly as soon as possible and find out how bad the situation really was. Carly was unpredictable. She was furious about Lorenzo, and full of hatred for Alexis, but had she really run off to tell Sonny the truth? Or was she just blowing off steam? Spilling the secret would hurt Carly, too, and if Alexis were dealing with anyone else, she would have taken some comfort from that fact. Unfortunately, an angry and insecure Carly was prone to lashing out indiscriminately, hurting herself and everyone around her. Yet Carly was known to have pangs of conscience, too, and a vivid memory of her own secret being torn from her. If Alexis could just talk to her, maybe it wasn't too late to talk her down.

After several frenzied passes through her address book, Alexis gave up. She hurled the useless leather volume across the car, where it hit the back door on the driver's side with a thump and fell askew to the floor. "Damn you, Carly," she cursed under her breath. She took a deep breath and turned her attention to the cell phone in her hand, punching buttons furiously in an aimless attempt to pull up a phantom contact list.

"Ms. Davis?" She barely heard Mike's soft voice addressing her from the front seat. He had a quiet voice for such an imposing man. "Is there something I can help you with?"

Alexis laughed bitterly and tossed the phone down on the seat next to her, giving up. She looked up at the burly bodyguard's close-cropped strawberry blonde head. His head was still, and from the back seat it appeared that his attention was fully focused on the road, but Alexis knew his eyes were in constant motion, scanning ahead, to the side, and in the rearview mirror for signs of trouble. "How are you with electronics, Mike? Can you teach me how to program my cell phone?"

"Probably. They're usually pretty straightforward, Ms. Davis."

"Hah. I bet you think making drinkable coffee is a snap, too."

"I never touch the stuff, ma'am. It's really not good for you."

Alexis was momentarily taken aback. She gave him a crooked look as she contemplated the sweet irony of that sentiment coming from Lorenzo Alcazar's muscle. "Your body is a temple, eh?" she asked skeptically.

"Something like that."

"So you're telling me I've entrusted my safety to uncaffeinated hands? I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that." Their eyes met briefly in the rearview mirror, and Alexis flashed him a warm smile to let him know she was teasing; in truth, she felt very safe with Mike and the rest of Lorenzo's men.

Mike smiled back and felt a slight flush rising. It wasn't hard to understand why his boss had gone off the deep end for Ms. Davis or why none of the darkly skilled men on the security detail were grumbling about pulling double shifts to stand watch over a little girl and her mother. Ms. Davis was a bit high strung for his own tastes, but she had more style and class and warmth in her pinky than the last woman to tickle the boss's fancy had in her whole body, from bony head to bony toe. Mike cringed at the memory. "I used to drink coffee," he said out loud. "Made me edgy and nervous. I like to be calm."

Alexis nodded. Mike did have a reassuring and enviable calm about him. "Well, I'm edgy and nervous, Mike, but I don't think it's the coffee." She picked her cell phone back up and stared at it a moment, considering whether to call Lorenzo to get Carly's number.

"Is it Mrs. Corinthos, ma'am?" Alexis looked up in surprise. "I didn't mean to intrude, but I couldn't help but hear you mention her name," Mike explained. "And I saw her at the courthouse earlier."

"Mrs. Corinthos could make anyone edgy and nervous." Alexis was purposefully non-responsive.

Mike nodded, rolling his eyes. "Yes, she could," he agreed.

Alexis couldn't help but laugh at the unexpected break in Mike's professional detachment. It hadn't occurred to her that he knew Carly, but of course it made sense. Lorenzo's previous project. Alexis quickly pushed that thought from her head. "I don't suppose you have her cell phone number, do you?" Alexis ventured.

"No, ma'am, I don't." Mike glanced in the mirror and saw the fresh disappointment and agitation on Alexis's face as she surveyed her phone with disgust. His natural instinct was to try to calm his edgy ward. "But if you're concerned about Mrs. Corinthos, I think you should give Mr. Alcazar a call. He may be able to set your mind at ease." Mike winced as soon as the words were out of his mouth. He had said more than he should.

Alexis frowned and cocked her head. "Why is that?" She looked at Mike in the rearview mirror, but he avoided meeting her eyes.

Mike shrugged. "Mr. Alcazar can explain." He turned his full attention back to the road, hoping to put an end to the uncomfortable discussion.

Instead, Alexis leaned forward in her seat to look at him more closely. He felt her eyes studying the side of his face. "I want you to explain, Mike," Alexis said carefully. "If there's something going on that affects me, I want to know about it." Mike remained silent. Alexis eyed the empty passenger seat in front of her. "Where is Marcus?"

"He had to take care of something for Mr. Alcazar. But don't worry. You're perfectly safe with me, Ms. Davis."

"I'm sure I am, Mike. But I know what a cautious man Mr. Alcazar is. This other assignment he had for Marcus must have been very important."

"I really couldn't say, ma'am."

"No, you won't say," Alexis corrected. "What's going on, Mike?"

"Please, just let it go. I should never have said anything."

"Because Mr. Alcazar told you to keep me in the dark?"

"Because Mr. Alcazar wouldn't want me to discuss this with you. He would want to do it himself."

"It must be pretty bad, then, if he wants to tell me himself. That way he can massage the ugly truth in just the right way?" Alexis let out a disgusted sigh, and she closed her eyes for a moment. A single, slow deep breath brought enough clarity to her thoughts. When she opened her eyes again, she nodded grimly. "Marcus went after Carly when she left the courthouse, didn't he?" Mike didn't contradict her. "What has he done to her, Mike?"

"Please. If you want your questions answered, you'll have to talk to Mr. Alcazar."

Alexis saw the flush rising on his neck and relented. The man was in a difficult position. She leaned back in her seat and dialed Lorenzo's number. She watched Mike carefully as she waited for the call to connect. "You're frightened of Mr. Alcazar, Mike?"

Mike shook his head. "No, ma'am. I do what he expects me to do, and I have no reason to be frightened of him."

It was an interesting answer, Alexis thought, but before she could contemplate it further, Lorenzo's voicemail picked up. She left a terse message. "Lorenzo, it's Alexis. Please call me." She disconnected the call and tossed the phone back on the seat, and then she leaned forward again and zeroed in on Mike. "No answer, Mike. So talk to me. Tell me what's going on, or I'm going to have to assume the worst about Mr. Alcazar and call the police."

"Please don't do that, ma'am." Mike was torn. He knew his boss wouldn't want him to let Ms. Davis's anger and suspicion fester. "Just give Mr. Alcazar a chance to explain things to you."

"Mr. Alcazar isn't available, Mike, so I need you to explain things. I will handle Lorenzo. I will make sure he understands that I dragged it out of you. But I need to know what he told you to do to Carly. I don't want to be an accessory to anything, and I certainly don't want to be the justification for any harm coming to her. He knows how I feel about being kept in the dark."

Mike glanced up at the rearview mirror and shook his head in grudging admiration. The lady knew which buttons to push - the invocation of her personal influence over Mr. Alcazar and the subtle reminder of his desire for her good opinion did the trick. "All I can tell you is that Mr. Alcazar was concerned about Mrs. Corinthos's reaction to your encounter and asked Marcus to step in if she seemed agitated when she left. She won't be harmed."

"Where is she?"

"That's all I'm going to say, Ms. Davis, so please don't ask me any more questions."

Her mind was racing with a dozen more questions she needed answers to, but the steel in Mike's calm voice and the set of his jaw told her that she had learned all she would from him. The rest would have to come from Lorenzo. "Okay," she conceded. "Thank you, Mike."

A few minutes later, the limousine pulled into the driveway at the lakehouse. Alexis felt a pang of relief to see that everything seemed calm. She had almost expected Sonny to be there, demanding to be let in to see his daughter, determined to take her away, flanked by men with guns, just as he was in the dreams that haunted her from time to time. But the only men with guns on the property worked for Lorenzo Alcazar. It was an odd thing to take comfort in.

Alexis joined Kristina and Alice for lunch, and once the little girl was down for her nap, Alexis went into the office and called Jax on his cell phone.

"Hello?" Jax answered. He sounded a little breathless, and she could hear car horns and bus engines in the background.

"Hi. It's me." She suddenly felt awkward. Things had been strained between them since Jax gave her his report on Lorenzo. She couldn't talk to Jax honestly about Lorenzo, and so they hadn't really talked at all, and the things they couldn't discuss hovered in the air between them, along with her lingering annoyance with Jax for going behind her back and for talking to Sonny.

"Hi, you," came the fond reply. She could hear the smile in Jax's voice, and she couldn't help but smile back. The tension evaporated. "Is everything okay?"

Alexis ignored his question. "Are you in New York?" She was surprised. Jax hadn't mentioned any travel plans that morning, and he had left his security detail at home.

"Yeah. I flew down for the day." He was almost yelling to try to make himself heard. "I had to meet with a friend who was passing through town for a couple of hours."

Alexis wondered if the friend might be Jerry, but she didn't want to ask. "When are you coming home?"

"This afternoon. I'll be back for dinner. Are you all right?"

"Yes, yes, I'm fine. Well, not exactly fine, but it's nothing that can't wait. Hurry home."

Suddenly the background noise disappeared. "Okay, I'm off the street. Tell me what's going on. I know that tone, o wife of mine."

Alexis gave a laugh that was almost a groan. "Ah. Well, funny you should mention that wife thing."

"Meaning?"

"Meaning . . . I might have told someone that we were getting remarried. You and I."

"We are?" Jax sounded amused.

"No, of course not. But if anyone asks you about our engagement, could you just nod your head and play along?"

"Um, okay. Sure. But can you tell me what this is about?"

"Oh. How do I explain this? Well, I had a pretty bad morning at the courthouse."

"The hearing on Carly's case?"

"Yeah. And after my ritual humiliation in open court, Carly came after me in the hallway and we had a rather heated discussion. Overheard by Judge Farmer. Remember, the judge who handled Kristina's custody case?"

"Of course I remember. She hasn't been impeached yet?"

"No, sadly. She's still just as overreaching and meddling as ever, and she still has Edward Quartermaine whispering in her ear. And this time he's whispering in her ear about Lorenzo Alcazar and me representing him. And, you know, they're all very concerned about Kristina's well-being and safety." Her tone was bitterly mocking. "Not that they ever worried about putting her in a house with the bunch of criminal lunatics that Ned calls a family. I mean, what's a little arson and kidnapping, right? You're never too young to enjoy a little bloodletting over the breakfast bar, and, really, a glass of fresh-squeezed vodka washes down the scrambled eggs and all those pills so nicely. I thought my family --- "

"Alexis," Jax interrupted. "You're a little off track."

"Sorry. Well, Judge Farmer also heard Carly saying some similar things to me. You know how Carly is, and she considers Lorenzo Alcazar her personal property. So Judge Farmer wanted to have a little talk. I tried to explain to her that I don't have a personal involvement with Lorenzo Alcazar, and I mentioned that you and I are involved. She made some obnoxious remark about dragging my daughter along on my romantic whims, and somehow I found myself telling her that we were getting married. I'm sorry. I thought it sounded better than saying we were just shacking up. I mean, what kind of mother moves her daughter in with a man without serious intentions, right?"

"A good mother who's letting a devoted friend help her out. Why didn't you explain?"

"Oh, I don't know. You and I are pretty hard to explain, Jax. Our relationship is unusual, to say the least. I didn't think she would understand. And I didn't think she would believe me. It was a lot simpler to just tell her that we were getting remarried."

"And it put to rest her concerns about Alcazar?"

"It seemed to." Alexis paused, biting nervously on her lower lip. She spoke more softly. "I was also a bit panicked. Carly threatened to tell Sonny about Kristina and left in a huff."

There was silence as Jax processed the news. "Do you think she'll do it?"

"I don't know. I really don't know. I haven't been able to reach her since. But Sonny hasn't shown up at my door yet. I have to say, as much as I hate having all these guards around Kristina, right now I'm glad that they're here."

"Yeah, well, I'll be there, too, as soon as I can. Let me go finish my errands, and then I'll come home. I should be there by five."

"Okay. Thanks. Be careful."

"I will. I love you."

Alexis hesitated a moment. She had said it to him dozens of times, and the sentiment was true, but the words were fraught now that they were lovers. "I love you, too." She hung up the phone and looked at it for a long, contemplative minute, and then she went outside on the patio to worry and wait.