Losing Balance
by Lionel

chapter 30

The conference room was suddenly silent as the door closed behind them and all eyes fell on Lorenzo Alcazar and his counsel. Any thought that Alexis's presence was just a coincidence and that his real attorney would be coming in at any moment fell away as Alexis followed Lorenzo to the table. They sat down near the other bidders at the end of the conference table opposite the ELQ board members. Alexis kept her eyes down as she removed a legal pad and pen from her briefcase.

"Alexis?" Ned was the first to speak. He was already reeling from Jax's news, and her unexpected appearance in the boardroom threw him completely off balance. "What are you doing here?"

Alexis finally looked up, first at Ned, and then she found Jax sitting two seats down from Ned on the opposite side. Jax looked concerned and hurt, and she met his eyes, trying to send a silent message of explanation. Out of the corner of her eye she spotted Helena and Sonny sitting a seat apart farther down on the same side of the table. Everyone was watching Alexis closely.

Before Alexis could respond to Ned, Lorenzo spoke up. "I've asked Ms. Davis to represent me in negotiations with ELQ, should it come to that. I hope that won't be a problem."

"That most certainly will be a problem," Edward chimed in from the head of the table. "Alexis was ELQ's general counsel. She can't represent you."

Alexis cleared her throat and found her voice. "Edward, that was several years ago. There is nothing that I learned in my short time at ELQ that could possibly be relevant."

Ned was still staring at her in disbelief. "You've got to be kidding me. Tell me this is a mistake, Alexis. Tell me you're not foolish enough to be working for Lorenzo Alcazar." Ned looked to Jax for reinforcement, but Jax was silent.

"I'm afraid I am, Ned," Alexis responded, more sarcastically than she had intended. Ned's judgmental tone triggered her anger. "If you have concerns, perhaps we can discuss them in private."

Ned couldn't let go. "How can you represent the man whose brother killed Kristina?" He turned his disbelieving gaze to Lorenzo. "Why would you want her to represent you?"

Lorenzo's eyes were ice cold and his lip curled in his habitual smirk. "That's between Ms. Davis and myself."

"Mr. Alcazar likes my leftovers," Sonny sneered from down the table. "You know, I'm no expert, Alexis, but it seems to me like there might be some kind of conflict of interest here. You and Ned, you were almost married, you share a kid. You got Jax down there, he was your husband and now you're living with him, right? And you and me, well, you know how it was with you and me." Sonny smiled in a way that sickened Alexis. She sat deathly still, pain and disbelief in her eyes, unable to look away or respond. "I mean, I think we can all appreciate why Mr. Alcazar would want your, uh, legal services, but it doesn't really seem right, does it? Not when you've been spreading them around here."

Alexis was paralyzed by the venom in Sonny's voice. Lorenzo had never seen her look so fragile, and he had to fight to conceal the rush of fury that came over him. He wanted desperately to drag Sonny out of his seat and remove the smug sneer from his face, but all Lorenzo could do was glare coldly at the man. Lorenzo was relieved when Jax jumped in.

"That's enough, Corinthos," Jax warned, with more menace than Lorenzo ever thought Jax could muster. "Leave her alone."

Momentarily surprised, if not shamed, by the cold threat in Jax's tone, Sonny fell silent.

Jax turned to Ned. "This is a cut and dried business transaction, Ned. I see no reason why we need to be so concerned about who does Mr. Alcazar's paperwork. Let's just get started."

Ned looked at Jax in surprise, but nodded. "Fine. We are running late as it is. We can address the issue later if we decide to pursue negotiations with Mr. Alcazar."

Ned stood up and moved to the front of the room where a screen was set up. He dimmed the lights and began his presentation. As Ned began describing the assets ELQ planned to sell, Jax discreetly rose from his seat and walked over to Alexis. Standing behind her, he put his hands on her shoulders and leaned down on the side opposite Lorenzo. "Are you okay?" he asked quietly.

Alexis nodded. "Did you get my phone message?"

Jax looked at her quizzically. "No."

"Helena," Alexis whispered, her hand covering her mouth. Jax looked down the conference table and saw Helena watching them closely. He nodded to Alexis and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek, and then he returned to his seat. After a moment he took out his cell phone and placed a call. As he listened, he met Alexis's eyes and gave her a small smile.

Lorenzo picked up a document from the pile of papers on the table in front of them and leaned toward Alexis. "Are you okay?" he asked, pointing at the first page of the document as if consulting her about a business point. His expression remained cool and unfriendly, but his tone was soft.

Alexis smiled bitterly. "Why wouldn't I be?" She indulged her annoyance with Lorenzo, knowing it would help sell their animosity to Helena.

"Better or worse than you expected?" Lorenzo murmured, still looking at the document in his hand.

"Not even close to over," Alexis said. She pointed meaninglessly to something on the page, and her fingers accidentally brushed against Lorenzo's hand. Alexis was suddenly acutely aware of Lorenzo's close physical presence and needed to get away. Her eyes met Lorenzo's and for a moment he made her feel naked, but then he found his steely gaze again. "Excuse me for a moment," she said, pushing her chair away from the table and standing.

Alexis felt a dozen sets of eyes watching her as she walked to the refreshment station set up at the back of the conference room. She poured herself a cup of coffee and leaned against the back wall sipping it, in no rush to return to the table. She surveyed the room while listening to Ned describe the mechanics ELQ would use for the auction.

After a few minutes, Lorenzo grew impatient waiting for Alexis to rejoin him. He flipped through a document as if looking for some bit of information, and then looked over at Alexis with an annoyed expression. He got up and walked over to her. "Abandoning your client in his hour of need, Ms. Davis?" he asked, standing in front of her.

Alexis shook her head. "You don't need my legal advice, Mr. Alcazar."

"No," Lorenzo admitted. His voice dropped to a barely intelligible whisper. "I need you." Lorenzo's back was to the room, and only Alexis could see the intense emotion and heated smile that flashed across his face. Alexis swallowed hard, trying not to react. Then, as quickly as it came, the smile was wiped away, and Lorenzo's face returned to its cold passivity. He turned around and stood against the wall next to Alexis, his arms crossed brusquely in front of him. After a moment he spoke quietly. "Shouldn't you get off your feet?"

Alexis shook her head. "I'm okay. I'm a fast healer." She took a sip of her coffee. "I like it back here. Sitting at the table made me dizzy - like being stuck in some absurd dream. From back here it's easier to get a little perspective."

"Like Scrooge?"

Alexis fought off a laugh before pulling her mask of indifference and resentment back on. "Exactly. I can see my Christmas Past, Present and Future all laid out before me. I'm just not entirely sure which is which."

"Does that make me your ghostly tour guide?"

Alexis considered Lorenzo for a moment. "No. I don't know what that makes you." Her eyes scanned the room. "Can you appreciate how absurd this is? Me, here, all these people?" Lorenzo raised an eyebrow. "Let me show you around. Let's see . . . well, over there is Jax, of course. My client, ex-husband and best friend, always on my side and very understanding."

"Don't forget lover," Lorenzo added, his resentment making his tone snide.

Alexis nodded carefully. "And then droning on and on at the podium is Ned, the man I literally left at the altar and the putative father of my daughter." Her tone was self-mocking, but her face gave nothing away. "He's less understanding and still a little angry with me, I think. He knows he's not Kristina's father, but that didn't stop him from trying to push me out of her life and build a nice little family for himself with his former cousin, Skye, who's sitting right over there. Skye thought my daughter was just the thing she needed to make her life complete, so she decided she should be her mother. At the head of the table, of course, is Edward Quartermaine. He looks cuddly, but he's as nasty as they come. It wasn't enough for him to throw his weight and money around to try to get me locked up and keep me away from Kristina, he actually set up Ned to lose custody, too. His own grandson. And then on the other side of the table is Ned's mother, Tracy, who seems to hate me on principle - I don't know if she's bothered more by the fact that I hurt her son or that I was married to Jax -- and Alan and Monica, who are decent enough, but basically helpless in the face of their family's dysfunction. Monica's actually a former client; I defended her in a sexual harassment suit when I first came to town. And of course there's Mr. Corinthos, my one-time client and friend. And last, but not least, Helena Cassadine, my very evil stepmother, the woman who made me what I am today." Alexis took a deep breath. "Welcome to my life," she said bitterly, and went back to sipping her coffee.

After a moment Lorenzo spoke quietly. "What do you think Helena's after?"

Alexis shrugged slightly. "I'm not sure. But I've been watching her. And if I had to guess I would say it's ELQ's share of the South American joint venture. I remember when Ned got involved in that. He was very excited about some of the compounds they were exploring. Frankly, I'm a little surprised to see it on the auction list, but I guess none of the drugs have panned out yet. Obviously he's quite serious about the need to streamline ELQ and raise as much cash as possible. Otherwise he would never have let Helena in the door. Or you for that matter."

"Oh, the upstanding Mr. Ashton has standards, does he?" Lorenzo smirked and raised an eyebrow. "Seems a bit hypocritical for a company with a mobster on its board."

Alexis and Lorenzo both glanced over at Sonny. He was watching them intently, and Alexis thought she saw some real emotion she couldn't identify flit across Sonny's face when their eyes met. Sonny quickly looked away, and it was gone.

"It wasn't Ned's choice," Alexis said in her former fiancé's defense. "If he had his way, Sonny would be off the board."

Lorenzo smiled mirthlessly. "If I had my way, Sonny would be a stain on the pavement right now after the way he spoke to you." Alexis winced at his imagery. "I'm afraid my anger almost made me blow our cover."

"I'm glad you didn't," Alexis said, biting her lip. "I don't need you to defend my honor, Lorenzo. A little humiliation never hurt anyone. I can take it."

Lorenzo gritted his teeth. "I know. But you shouldn't have to. Corinthos goes out of his way to be cruel to you. I've seen it several times now. Why?"

Alexis shrugged. "I don't know. For some reason he feels like he needs to hurt me. I don't really understand it. But I'm getting used to being mortified in front of large groups of people."

"But it doesn't just roll off your back, Alexis. I can see that his words hurt you."

Alexis nodded. "Yes, they do. Because when he acts like that, I don't recognize him; I don't see any trace of the man I thought he was. And that makes me feel like I was a deluded fool on top of everything else." She shook her head bitterly.

Lorenzo's eyes crinkled almost imperceptibly. "If I could I would hug you right now."

Alexis rolled her eyes gently. "I think that would definitely give people the wrong idea. I'm going to get angry and walk away now." Alexis gave Lorenzo a furious glare and walked back to her seat at the table shaking her head. Lorenzo watched her go with a look of barely contained annoyance on his face.

Ned was just finishing his presentation. "We'll take a short break now," he announced to the audience. "After that I'll take whatever questions you may have. Please help yourself to coffee and refreshments."

As the participants wandered over to the refreshment station, Alexis found Jax talking with Alan and Monica. Alexis joined them, greeting Alan and Monica with a quick hello and a wan smile. Jax wrapped his arm around Alexis's waist and kissed her on the lips in a territorial display of affection that wasn't lost on anyone in the room.

"How is Kristina?" Alan asked.

"Oh, she's wonderful, thanks," Alexis answered. "Growing by leaps and bounds."

"Did I hear that you two are living at the lake house with Jax?" Monica said.

Alexis nodded. "We are. Jax was kind enough to take us in while I recuperate."

"And beyond that, I hope," Jax smiled, kissing Alexis on the cheek.

"We'd love it if you would bring Kristina by the house sometime," Alan suggested. "We all miss her very much. Especially Ned, of course."

Alexis smiled weakly, lost for a polite response, dumbfounded by how cheerfully oblivious Alan could be. She spotted Lorenzo watching her sternly from across the room. "I think I'd better go speak with my client before the meeting gets underway again," she said.

As Alexis crossed the room toward Lorenzo, Ned pulled away from the group of people he was speaking with and made a beeline for her. He took her by the arm and stopped her in her tracks. "What the hell are you doing with Lorenzo Alcazar?" he demanded.

"He's a client, Ned," Alexis said impatiently. "That's it." She turned to walk away but Ned was still holding her arm. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw Lorenzo take a step toward her then stop.

"Don't you ever learn?" Ned whispered harshly. "Sonny was bad enough, but Lorenzo Alcazar? You've put everyone through hell trying to keep Sonny from finding out about Kristina, and now you've got her involved with someone twice as dangerous."

"Kristina isn't involved with anyone, Ned. Let go of me."

Ned dropped her arm. "Has she met him?" Alexis didn't respond, but her face told Ned the answer. Ned shook his head angrily. "You ought to think twice about continuing your association with Mr. Alcazar. My name is still on that birth certificate, and I will continue to do whatever I have to do to keep that little girl safe. Don't make Sonny Corinthos look like a good alternative."

Alexis glared at Ned. "Keep your voice down." She looked around the room and found Helena, Sonny and Lorenzo all watching her. "You have a hell of a lot of nerve threatening me. From where I sit your family looks just as lethal as Lorenzo Alcazar. I am representing him on a single isolated business matter. That is it."

Ned snorted skeptically. "Where have I heard that before? Oh, I know. Just before you became a mouthpiece for the mob."

Jax stepped up next to Ned. "That's enough, Ned. Maybe you should give Alexis a little credit."

Ned turned and looked at Jax with exaggerated pity. "You don't even know, do you? You've already begun to lose her, Jax. You think she's yours, but she's not. Her eye is always on that door. I've been where you are, and I finally figured it out. All you want to do is make her happy, but she'll never let you, because she doesn't want to be happy. She just can't stay away from the bad boys. Why is that, Alexis? Is it the thrill of the danger or is it just the only thing that's familiar?" Alexis didn't answer, and Ned turned his attention back to Jax. "If it's not Sonny or Alcazar, it'll be some other dark, brooding lowlife who treats her badly. Sooner or later, you're going to lose her, Jax, just like I did."

Tracy swooped in from behind Alexis. "Isn't losing Alexis sort of like losing an albatross? Or your virginity? A consummation devoutly to be wished? You should count your blessings, Ned, my boy, that you got out before it was too late. Now maybe you ought to concentrate on getting your daughter out, too. Maybe you can put in a call to that nice Judge Farmer and tell her about the new friends your baby's mama has been making."

Lorenzo materialized at Alexis's side as Tracy spoke, making Alexis jump slightly. He coolly surveyed the group gathered around. "Would you all please excuse us?" he asked. "Ms. Davis and I have business to attend to, if you don't mind."

Jax stepped back and Tracy walked off to talk to Edward, but Ned just glowered at Lorenzo. "I certainly do mind, Mr. Alcazar," Ned said. "I'd like to know what the hell is going on here? I can't help but wonder why a woman whom you have every reason to hate, a woman who I know is frightened of you, is acting as your attorney."

Lorenzo stepped up close to Ned, almost chest to chest in a menacing fashion. "As you no doubt recall, Mr. Ashton, Ms. Davis was responsible for my brother's death. She is not in jail, nor has any harm come to her or your daughter. I loved my brother, Mr. Ashton. I would suggest that you do not question how I choose to seek reparations for his loss." Lorenzo turned to Alexis with cold formality. "Ms. Davis. I have a phone call to make. Perhaps when I return you will have tidied up your personal affairs and we can get back to business." Lorenzo turned and walked to the door, knowing that if he stayed he would lose his temper and ruin everything.

As soon as the door of the conference room closed behind Lorenzo, Sonny sauntered over to Alexis. "Ned. Jax," Sonny said, over-articulating their names. "Can I have a moment alone with Alexis?"

Ned laughed in disgust and walked away, while Jax looked to Alexis for her reaction. She shrugged and rolled her eyes. "Why not?" she said wearily. Jax squeezed her hand gently and followed Ned, leaving her alone with Sonny. "What do you want, Sonny?" Alexis asked in a hostile tone.

Sonny crossed his arms on his chest. "What are you doing with Alcazar? I thought you were wise to him. Whatever he's told you, he's just using you, Alexis, to get to me."

Alexis sighed. "Believe it or not, Sonny, not everything is about you. I killed his brother. That's what connects me to Lorenzo Alcazar, and it has nothing at all to do with you."

"See, that's what I don't get, Alexis," Sonny said. "It seems kind of sick, doesn't it, for him to be with the woman who killed his brother. That's why I can't help but wonder what else is going on."

Alexis wanted to scream. "I am working with Mr. Alcazar on a business transaction, Sonny. It has nothing to do with you. I am not plotting against you. I am not telling your secrets. I am representing him in this single transaction. That is it."

Sonny shook his head. "Yeah, and you'd like people to believe that he's forcing you into it. But I don't buy it. I've been watching the two of you. It's not just business, is it, Alexis?"

"What it is, Sonny, is none of your goddamn business. So just leave me the hell alone."

Jax was standing guard vigilantly ten feet away, and Alexis's agitation drew him a step closer. The movement caught Sonny's attention. "So I'm confused," Sonny smirked. "Are you sleeping with Alcazar or Jax now? Or both? I guess it makes sense. Both of them only want what I've had."

"You pig." Alexis shook her head in disgust. "I've had enough of this, Sonny," she said, throwing up her hands and turning toward the door. As she walked out of the conference room, she shook her head and muttered to herself, "I've had more than enough."