Losing Balance
by Lionel

chapter 18

After Alexis left him at the restaurant, Lorenzo went home and spent hours in his private gym trying to work out his frustration and anger. When he began his workout, he was angry at Alexis - for doubting him about Helena, for thinking he would use Kristina, and for lashing out at him - but as he poured out his energy on weight machines and punching bags, Lorenzo's anger with Alexis mutated into anger with himself.

Lorenzo was nothing if not rational, and once he overcame his initial burst of frustration and disappointment, he quickly understood how the situation must have appeared to Alexis. She had no reason to trust him, and every reason to be wary, and it was easy to see why the revelation that he knew her deepest secret terrified her and sent her defenses into lockdown. He kicked himself mentally for not being more careful with that revelation and for pushing her forward at too fast a pace. Luke had warned him to be careful, but he hadn't listened well enough.

In his initial anger at Alexis's attack, Lorenzo had complied with her request and removed his guards, but now he was upset with himself for reacting impulsively and incautiously. He should have insisted that she keep them on, or hire someone else; he should have found some way to convince her that the threat from Helena was real. He had left Alexis and Kristina unprotected.

He considered sending his guards back to the lake house immediately, and he considered calling Alexis in the middle of the night and trying to convince her somehow to be careful, but he knew that either approach would only make her withdraw farther from him. She was too frightened and angry to listen to him right now. Perhaps Jax would listen to him. Lorenzo decided that he would call Jax first thing in the morning and speak to him about Alexis.

*****

"Get your hands off my daughter." Alexis's voice was as cold as Jax had ever heard it - cold with threat and fear. "Put her down, Helena."

Helena sat in the rocking chair next to Kristina's crib with the little girl on her lap. Kristina was still drowsy and was lying in Helena's arms drinking a cup of milk. It was a classic tableau of grandmother and child, but Jax had never seen a more chilling sight.

At the sound of her mother's voice, Kristina sat up and saw Jax and Alexis at the door. "Mama Jax," she said smiling, reaching her arms toward her mother. Alexis went to her, and Helena did not resist as Alexis lifted the little girl from her lap. Holding Kristina protectively on her hip, Alexis backed away until she was standing just in front of Jax.

"Alexis, my dear. I was just getting acquainted with your daughter. I think we really should get to know each other. After all, I'm the closest thing to a grandmother the poor thing has."

Alexis took the cup from Kristina's hand and threw it to the floor. "What the hell is this?" The little girl whimpered at the loss of her bottle, but was quickly distracted by a smile from Jax.

"Oh, don't be so melodramatic, my dear," Helena responded. "It's just milk. Did you think it was something more nefarious? Not this time."

"There won't be another time, Helena. If you ever come near my daughter again, I will kill you myself."

"Oh, you can save your breath, Alexis. Your pathetic threats have never frightened me." Helena turned her attention to Jax, eyeing his bare chest appreciatively. "Mr. Jacks. It's so good to see you again. I must admit, though, I'm a little disappointed in you. Taking up with Alexis again? I thought more of you than that. I thought you'd realized that my husband's little mistake could never keep a man like you happy."

"What the hell are you doing here, Helena?" Jax asked impatiently.

"There's something I need to discuss with Alexis." Helena gestured toward Kristina. "I wanted to be sure I would have your attention."

"Make it quick," Alexis said through gritted teeth.

"There's something that I need you to do for me, my dear."

"Go to hell."

"Oh, I think you'd better hear me out." Helena dropped the pretense of social nicety and her voice became threatening. "I'm going to give you 48 hours to remove yourself as administrator of the Cassadine estate and to transfer control of all Cassadine assets to me."

"Why would I do that?"

"Because you are vulnerable. I have decided to let you live because I think you may be useful to me shortly. But you have seen how easily I can get to your daughter. So I think you won't be so quick to dismiss me or anger me, Alexis. You have a little girl now, and that makes you vulnerable, just as it did your mother before you."

Helena stood and walked to the door of Kristina's room. Jax and Alexis stepped back out of her way almost involuntarily. Jax waited for Alexis to respond, but she was unable to speak.

"She's a very pretty little girl, Alexis," Helena said, reaching out to touch Kristina's cheek. "Quite delicate, like your mother. Forty-eight hours, my little mouse." Her bearing as regal as ever, Helena turned and walked briskly through the living room and out the front door.

Alexis watched Helena leave, standing frozen in place, stunned, trying to process the situation. Jax wrapped his arms around her and Kristina protectively, and Alexis tucked her head into his shoulder, accepting his support. After a moment, she withdrew from his embrace and sat down on the living room couch, looking Kristina over carefully for any sign that Helena had harmed her. Oblivious to the adults' concerns, Kristina quickly slid off Alexis's lap and busied herself with the old train set Jax had set up in the corner.

Jax spoke first. "I'm going to go make some calls and arrange for security around here. Will you be okay?"

Alexis nodded, and Jax went to the office. Soon she heard his muffled voice talking on the phone. Security would be the first priority, but then what? Alexis wasn't ready to think about her next step, so she headed to the kitchen to get breakfast ready. Along the way she made a detour to Jax's room to retrieve her hair scrungy from his bedside table, where it had been discarded last night.

Alexis paused for a moment looking at the bed, remembering what had happened there overnight. She knew in her head that it had been beautiful, but she couldn't recapture that feeling. All of the warmth and happiness had been sucked out of her by Helena's visit. The familiar icy hand of fear and powerlessness seemed to have her heart in its vice grip.

Jax's cell phone rang, and she retrieved the phone from the pocket of his pants, which lay on the floor next to the bed. She didn't recognize the number on the caller id.

"Hello?" she answered.

"Alexis? It's Lorenzo. Please don't hang up."

"Lorenzo." She had forgotten about him; she hadn't considered yet what Helena's appearance implied about Lorenzo. Alexis felt a flush of guilt and regret.

"I'm really not trying to bother you, Alexis. I was calling for Jax."

"Why?"

"I guess I just wanted to make sure he's looking out for you. I know you're angry with me right now, and that's fine. I wish you weren't. I hope I can fix it. But the important thing right now is keeping you and Kristina safe. I know you don't trust me, but Helena really is a threat right now. Be furious with me if you need to, but please don't let your guard down."

Alexis squeezed her eyes shut. "She was just here."

"Helena? Are you all right?"

"Yes, I'm all right. I'm an idiot. She walked right into Kristina's room. She was there when we woke up." Alexis walked back out to the living room and sat down on the floor next to Kristina.

"Is Kristina okay?"

"I think so. I can't believe I let her get that close, Lorenzo. I can' t believe I was so careless." She shook her head in disgust. "You weren't lying, were you? About Helena, I mean."

"I wasn't lying about anything, Alexis. I wasn't faking anything."

"What about Kristina? You lied about that." Her words were accusing, but he could hear in her tone that she hoped he could explain it away.

"I never lied to you, Alexis."

"Okay, you didn't lie. You conveniently neglected to mention all this time that you knew that my daughter's father is really a man who happens to be your enemy. That's a pretty important piece of information, don't you think? That's hardly an innocent omission."

"All this time?" He was confused. "I just found out yesterday."

"Carly just told you?"

"Carly didn't tell me. I didn't realize she knew. I wondered what she had on you. She hasn't told Sonny?"

"Not yet. If she didn't tell you, who did?"

"I figured it out myself, Alexis."

"How?"

She could almost hear Lorenzo squirming in his seat. "I told you I did a little research about you, right? Well, when I read about you and Sonny, and then I saw the DNA test results, I started to wonder. I talked to the lab technician and he told me what he did."

"Great."

"Don't worry. He won't spill to anyone else."

"Did you do something to him?" Alexis asked, suddenly suspicious.

Lorenzo laughed. "Relax. I just helped him move out of town. Seems it was a lifelong dream of his to move to Nashville. Listen, I promise you I won't tell anyone else about this, and I've done what I can to make sure no one else follows the same trail I did."

"Really?"

"Really."

"Thank you," she said sincerely. "Listen, I'm sorry, Lorenzo. I'm sorry I thought you were lying. And I'm sorry for lashing out at you last night. I was scared. I just . . . I really need to protect Kristina."

"I know. It's okay. Tell me about Helena. What did she want?"

"She wants me to turn over the Cassadine estate. She gave me 48 hours to walk away. I guess showing up in Kristina's room was her warning shot."

"What are you going to do?"

"I don't know. I guess I don't really have much choice. I'll get started on the papers this morning." Alexis sounded resigned.

"You do have a choice, Alexis. You can choose to fight her. She's not omnipotent. You can keep Kristina safe if you're careful."

"My father couldn't keep my mother safe."

"I can keep you and Kristina safe."

"This isn't your problem, Lorenzo."

"I want to help you, Alexis."

"Why? This doesn't make sense. We barely know each other, Lorenzo. And what I do know of you tells me to run in the opposite direction. You're supposed to hate me. Why are you so determined to take up arms in my war?"

Lorenzo let out an exasperated sigh. "I don't know. I'm not sure I can explain it to you because I don't fully understand it myself. I like you, Alexis. I want to help you get what you want. If there's more to it than that, it probably has something to do with my own family, and a war that I wish I had taken up long ago. But there's nothing nefarious about it."

"What war?" Alexis asked softly.

"It's a long story. Maybe I can tell it to you over dinner. Can we reschedule that dinner we were supposed to have last night?"

There was a long pause. "No, I'm sorry. I can't have dinner with you."

"Why not?"

"The same reasons I've been telling you over and over. I never should have agreed in the first place. Listen, I need to go." Jax came back into the living room and sat down with Alexis and Kristina. He began to rub the tense muscles in Alexis's neck and shoulders.

"Wait," Lorenzo pled. "What are we going to do about keeping you safe?"

"You don't need to do anything, Lorenzo. Jax and I will handle this."

"Do you really think Jax can keep you safe?"

"Yes. I think so."

"Okay. If you change your mind, or you need anything, I'll be here."

"Thank you. Goodbye." She hung up the phone.

Jax continued rubbing her shoulders, then kissed her gently on the side of her neck. "That was Lorenzo?"

Alexis nodded slightly. With her head tipped to the side to accept Jax's kisses and attempting to relax her muscles under his massage, it was difficult to move her head at all. "He called to tell you we should watch out for Helena. A little late, I guess. How did it go?" She gestured toward the office with her eyes.

"Fine. We'll have guards over here later this morning."

"Terrific." Her tone was sarcastic and sullen. "What am I going to do, Jax? Guards won't stop Helena."

"You're right. Not if she's determined to come after you. But if you give her what she wants, she won't come after you. Can you do that?"

Alexis shook her head. "I don't know. I guess I have to."

Alexis wasn't sure what to say. His words sounded true when he said them, and she wanted to agree with him, but she wasn't sure. She leaned back into his arms, tipped her head up and kissed him warmly on the mouth.

Jax smiled appreciatively. "Mmm. I'm sorry this morning started off on the wrong foot. I was really looking forward to waking up with you in my arms."

"Me, too."

"Do you think we can convince Kristina to go back to bed? Maybe we could start the morning over again, nice and slowly."

"Nope." Alexis shook her head regretfully. "There are no do-overs with one-year-olds. And very few slow mornings."

Jax hugged her tighter, kissing her cheek. "Maybe we'll have better luck tomorrow."

chapter 19