The Long Road Home
by Terry

Chapter 22

"Joy, let me call Kevin. We've got trouble and I'm afraid if we don't do something, Alexis... "

Seeing Johnny morph from a relaxed state into one of incredible anxiousness forced Joy into her own level of anxiety.

"What's wrong, Johnny. What are you seeing that I'm not?"

"She's shut down, again. I can see it. Ninety-five percent of the time when you hear those two words come out of her mouth, she's hiding something. Use to drive Sonny loco sometimes."

"What two words?"

"The ones she just walked out of here throwing back at us. ‘I'm fine’. Joy, let me go ahead and call Kevin from in here. Would you take a cup of coffee and casually go sit with her? Don't push her... just be with her. I'll be in as soon as I talk to Kevin. I also have to head off a potential disaster and I'm not sure how to go about it."

Johnny watched Joy leave the kitchen and dialed Kevin's number. Waiting for Kevin to answer, Johnny sent a silent prayer up for Alexis. He did not like the way she looked at all this morning. He knew she needed to remember her past, but the difference he saw in her now versus after she just woke up yesterday afternoon was like two totally different people.

"Hello."

"Doc, it's Johnny. We got a little problem going on here and I don't know how to handle it."

"What's going on, Johnny?"

"It's Alexis. She's beginning to remember the past and the memories that are jumping out are not good ones. This morning, sometime around 3:30 or 4:00, I found her in the living room. She asked me who was trying to kill her."

"Kill her?"

"Yeah, she remembered gunfire and a couple of bombings that she got too close to."

"You mean, Sonny Corinthos was the object of those events and she was standing too close to him, right?"

"Yeah, but she didn't remember it that way. She doesn't remember Sonny at all. She's looking at it like somebody was coming after her. I think she finally believes me that it was the client the attackers were after. But, she's not satisfied with the way things are coming back to her. I believe she's forcing it. She gets through pulling that memory and analyzing it to pieces then forces more. Well, she forced herself right into remembering that Helena had kidnapped her and her best friend Chloe Morgan was murdered by someone in her own family. Doc, she's shut down. I don't mean she... went back... you know... there. But, I think she's shoving it all in again."

"I'm on my way in, Johnny. Stay with her until I get there. I don't want her thinking, Johnny. At all."

"You're asking the impossible. How do you get a lawyer to stop thinking; especially when that lawyer is a certain Alexis Davis."

"It's your job to distract her this morning, Johnny. I'll be there in about thirty minutes. See you then."

"Wait doc, there's something else. Sonny will be here sometime this morning to check on her. He does not know she is awake. It's your call, but I don't think he needs to see her yet. It's too soon for her."

"You're right, Johnny. I'll call him myself. You just take care of Alexis. You're doing great, Johnny. Anyone else would not have been able to accomplish as much with her as you have. Remember that and I'll see you in a few."

"Thanks, Doc."

Disconnecting his call with Johnny, Kevin dialed the direct number to Sonny's home that Johnny had given him.

"Yeah."

"Sonny, it's Kevin Collins. I need a moment of your time."

"Sure, what time you want me there?"

"I don't."

"Excuse me?"

"I'm sorry, that was a bit rude of me. I need you to just listen to me for a minute, Sonny."

"There's something wrong with Alexis, isn't there? What is it, Kevin? What's happened to Alexis? I'm coming down there now."

"SONNY, WAIT. There is nothing wrong with Alexis. Damn, what is it with these men she surrounds herself with that think they can do or say anything they want regardless of how it affects her? I have always found that she is a most capable and rational woman and up until recent events was able to handle the complications of her life quite well. Is everyone else around her blind to that?"

Hearing total silence on the other end of the phone, Kevin was afraid he was speaking to a dead line.

"Sonny? ..... Sonny?"

"I'm here, and you're right. I did the same thing I have always attacked Jax and Ned for doing. Tell me what's going on, Kevin. You got my attention."

Realizing that this was not the way to tell Sonny about Alexis, Kevin changed his mind about telling Sonny over the phone.

"I need to come see you, Sonny. There is something I would like to discuss with you about Alexis' care. Will you be home later, say in about 2-3 hours?"

"Sure, Kev. I'll be here. You need my help with Alexis?"

It was a tough question for Kevin, but he answered it as truthfully as he could, knowing that his answer had more than one meaning.

"Yes. I could use your help with Alexis."

_______________

Half an hour later, Kevin was standing in front of Alexis, worried at what he was seeing.

"Let's take a walk, Alexis... get outside for a while. It's a beautiful morning and you look like you could use a little fresh air."

"I'm fine. There is no need to worry about me, Kevin."

Moving to stand within her line of vision that kept readjusting at his slightest move, Kevin looked into her eyes forcing her to look into his.

"No, Alexis. You are not fine. You're hiding and you're manipulating the circumstances around you in order to be able to handle it the best way you think possible. That is not good for your mental health right now. You need to talk."

Alexis finally reached her limit. She tried so hard not to get angry or lose her patience with Kevin. She had been so afraid of what she would learn from her past that she consented to how Kevin and Johnny were helping her handle her reemergence. But, they had no idea who she was or what she needed. They could not understand her need for privacy; she needed time to deal with the facts on her own. She needed time alone to think.

"Is talking going to bring back Chloe? Is talking going to change that she's dead because I couldn't protect her from my family? No Kevin, it won't. And I am not about to stand here and take a chance on jumping back into 'la la' land because you think talking will make me feel better. It won't."

Losing his patience with her, Kevin gave it right back to her in the same manner she had just given it to him. She was a fighter and would not react to mealy mouth responses, patronization or condescending attitudes.

"Right now, I don't care if you feel better, Alexis. What I do care about is that you are standing here in front of me giving me hell. And as unappealing as I might find that, my goal here is to make sure that you have the ability to do that for a lifetime to come. Are you catching what I'm telling you here? I don't want to lose you to what you're referring to as 'la la' land either. But, what you seem to be forgetting is why you fell into your state of catatonia. It came about as a direct result from what you are doing right now. And if you don't find a more healthy way of dealing with the difficulties and losses of your life, you will end up there again. Are you hearing me, Alexis?"

Taking a step back from Kevin, she looked around the room for Johnny. She needed Kevin out of there. Not seeing him, she looked back at Kevin without realizing the question of Johnny's whereabouts still remained evident on her face.

"I told Johnny to stay outside for a minute. I did not want you calling to be rescued before I was ready for you to be rescued. I will however, call him back in if you promise me you will think about what I said. It's important, Alexis. The choice here is yours. You can either walk out of here healthy and whole, or you can spend the rest of your life here. It really is your choice. When you have made your choice, call me and I'll be here. I know how determined you can be, but this time counselor you need a little outside help whether you are ready to admit it or not. Tell you what! I'll leave a quarter on the counter for when you do decide to call. And I know, you will. You're a smart lady. I have first hand experience with just how smart you are."

Kevin turned to go without giving her a chance to respond. He didn't want a response from her right now. She needed time. Opening the door to the hallway he almost laughed at the sight that confronted him. Johnny was pacing back and forth like an expectant father with fear and trepidation written all over his face.

"Ok, Johnny. It's your turn. I left her with a lot to think about and a choice to make. She has the choice to either accept our help or not. What you need to know is that if she chooses not to accept our help, then she takes a very real chance of returning to her previous state. Right now, I think she trusts you more than anyone else, so it's up to you to make sure she makes the right choice. For now, I want her out of that room and into the sunlight. I want her to remember what it feels like to be free. Call me if anything comes up. Personally, I'm betting you won't have to because she will make the call before you get a chance to."

"Thanks, Doc. Hey, are they supposed to be coming this fast?"

"What?"

"What she's remembering. It seems like it's all just coming too fast for her to be able to handle it right. I mean like she's supposed to."

"I should have known it would come this fast knowing who we're dealing with. She is not content to just let it happen in its own time. She's pushing herself and it's dangerous. If she doesn't slow down, we could be faced with another melt down. From what I understand there has been quite a lot she has had to deal with in the past year and it is imperative that she allow time to heal the trauma of it all. She must take it slow. And you know as well as I do, the word slow is not in her vocabulary. Look, I have to go see Sonny. You go ahead and get her out of that room for awhile. I'll see you later on this afternoon."

"See ya, Doc."