A Crack in the Mirror
by Zandergirl

chapter 1

This picks up with Ric and Alexis just meeting at the Metro Court right after Alexis witnesses a “friendly” moment between Ric and Reese and she leaves. They have not met with the judge to discuss divorce.

I brought back Steven Webber because I loved him with Ric and Alexis.

“How are you?” Ric asked uneasily.

“I just came from an appointment with Dr. Meadows. The baby’s fine.”

“I asked how you were,” he emphasized; a little hurt that she glossed over his intended question.

“How am I supposed to be?” she answered taking inventory with exaggerated cheer. “Let’s see, I’m pregnant, my husband just walked out on me, I just found him, AKA, you in a compromising position with your new “confidant” and you both lied to my face about what’s really going on between the two of you. Yep! I’d say I’m fine!”

“Alexis I don’t know what you’re --”

“Stop it Ric! Really, Just because I’m pregnant and a little - okay - a lot hormonal doesn’t mean that I can’t see that there’s more to you and Agent Marshall than meets the eye.”

Ric’s eyes fell to the floor then up again as he twirled the sweat-laden water glass before him staring blankly into space.

“You might as well bare your soul, come clean, ease your conscience … whatever. If not for me than for our child. We wouldn’t want him or her born to a blatant liar, would we?”

Ric sighed and closed his eyes feeling the strain of guilt that had been mounting for days. The night was fuzzy but he could envision Reese, eyes closed, mouth open as she twisted and turned underneath him. At the time the feeling was wild, dangerous and erotic. Now it made him sick.

“I slept with her,” he admitted quietly. “After I left you at the courthouse, I went to the bar at the Metro Court and started to tie one on. Reese showed up and joined me in my misery.”

Alexis caught her breath and sharply inhaled. She knew she was asking for it. She just hoped and prayed that she’d never get the truth in all of its ugly glory. Swallowing hard, she placed her hand on her stomach and rubbed it tenderly as if to ease the ensuing pain for their unborn child.

“Let me guess,” she whispered clearing her throat. “You escorted Reese to her room and felt it only gentlemanly to let her in and make sure that she was all right. Been there, remember? After multi-course cocktails at The Cellar? I know my memory was a little sketchy that night but I remember what happened when you took me home. So…who kissed whom first? Wait a minute! That’s tacky to ask, isn’t it?”

“Alexis,” Ric sighed. “Please.” He averted his eyes to look at her stomach and then closed them. She was the epitome of beauty and grace in her elegant black maternity dress. He’d always heard that pregnant woman “glowed” and his wife was living proof of that.

“Please?” she asked smiling nervously. “Please have the decency to come clean with me. It was lies that cost us our marriage, let’s at least end it with truth.”

“Not here,” he looked around the restaurant. “Can we go back to the apartment? We can talk there and I’d really like to see Kristina.”

“I don’t know,” Alexis answered honestly. “She’s confused and she misses you. When you come home and then leave again, she gets upset.”

He looked down forlorn yet understanding. “I was hoping she was getting used to the new arrangement.”

“Not so new Ric,” Alexis pointed out. “It isn’t the first time you’ve walked out on us. And she’ll never get ‘used to it’. What she’s used to is her Uncle Ric tucking her in at night and reading her a bedtime story. She can’t comprehend your walking out the door and not coming back.”

“Alexis you know that I love Kristina and still want to be a part of her life.”

Struggling with her protective nature, Alexis’s first instinct was to deny him but in her heart she couldn’t. No matter how hurt she was by Ric’s decision to end their marriage, Kristina shouldn’t suffer because of it. Reluctantly, Alexis pulled out her cell phone and dialed.

“Viola? Could you hold off on taking Kristina to the park? Ric would like to stop by and see her for a little while. Just give her a snack – fruit only – and we’ll be there shortly…thanks. Bye.”

“I suppose a ‘thank you’ is in order,” Ric mumbled.

“Not necessary.” She replied curtly.

Alexis got up and gathered her purse to leave.

“We can ride together,” he offered meekly.

“I have my car. I’ll see you at ho- there.”

Ric quietly drove the route that always used to bring him comfort at the end of a long day. He’d turn each corner in anticipation as it brought him closer to home where Alexis and Kristina were eagerly waiting. It used to be the high point of his day - his safe place, his salvation. Now he dreaded each turn knowing that it was bringing him closer to divulging the details of a dark truth; one that would permanently change their relationship more than divorce ever could and it would break Alexis’s heart.

He pulled into the parking lot behind her, turned off the ignition and waited as she got out of her car giving her ample time to go inside and get settled before he knocked on the door. It would be better for Kristina not to see them enter together. He was a visitor now, which was something the little girl needed to get used to.

Even the thought of it made him feel cruel. Because of his decision, a two and a half-year-old would have to change her world and accommodate the changes he set in motion. People get divorced every day, he reasoned. Somehow, that reality refused to bring him solace.

Five minutes passed and Ric finally opened the door and got out. His feet felt heavy, reluctantly carrying him across the parking lot as if he were walking in dry sand. Finally arriving at the door, his first thought was to pull out his key and let himself in. He slowly removed it from its ring and looked down at the shiny silver symbol of home in his hand then closed his fingers pressing it so tightly that it left an indentation in his palm.

Another painful reminder of his decision.

Knocking softly, Alexis answered the door, her left hand resting on her swollen stomach. She took a step back and let him in. Kristina was on the couch quietly thumbing through a picture book but when she looked up and saw Ric her tiny face lit up

“Wic!”

“Hello sweetheart, “ he acknowledged nervously plunging his hands in his pockets.

She immediately dropped the book and eased her tiny frame off the couch running over to him. Removing his hands he knelt accepting her into his arms, his eyes closed and tearing. Kissing her hair, Ric inhaled the scent of innocence; a mixture of baby shampoo and powder combined with the naturally sweet essence of a little girl.

Alexis put her hand over her mouth to stifle a sob feeling the sting of ensuing tears as they threatened to claim her eyes. She watched helplessly as the two people she loved most in the world desperately clung to each other; one ecstatic about a reunion, the other mourning an impending separation. It was more than she could bear to witness.

“I-I,” she stuttered. “I’m going to get some ice tea.”

“Decaffeinated?” Ric asked without even thinking about it.

‘Of course,” she quietly answered, even more frazzled, and headed for the kitchen.

Kristina let go and grabbed Ric’s hand pulling him across the living room to the sofa. Picking up her book she handed it to him and determinedly climbed up leaving a space for him to sit beside her.

“Dr. Seuss again, I see!” he smiled. “I read that when I was your age too. I bet you didn’t know that.” He sat down and she snuggled close in his arms as he opened the book.

From the kitchen Alexis could hear the soothing sound of Ric’s rich voice as he read the familiar rhymes. For a moment, she allowed herself to drift back to happier times.

Ric would just get home from work and Kristina, impatient to be read to, led him to the couch before he could even loosen his tie. Rolling her eyes, Alexis poured a scotch for him and a glass of water for herself, then curled up in the adjacent chair watching the two of them read. Ric would smile, relaxed; stealing a sip of his drink while Kristina focused on the colorfully illustrated pages.

After a while Alexis would go to the kitchen and order something for dinner. When she came back into the living room she’d find Kristina sound asleep curled up on Ric’s chest as it rose and fell rocking her gently in the sway of his slumber.

Without thinking, Alexis plunked a few ice cubes into each glass and began pouring the tea. The heavy pitcher wobbled in her hand disguising her trembling, the byproduct of the all too sentimental memory of their life together. Setting the pitcher down she grabbed hold of one glass and was about to get the other when the condensation on the outside made the glass slick and it slipped through her fingers crashing onto the floor.

Ric started at the sound of breaking glass and set the book down kissing Kristina quickly before jumping up and running to the kitchen. He found Alexis on her hands and knees gathering the sharp shards of glass.

“It just slipped through my fingers,” she explained quietly. Like everything else.

“Let me do that,” he said kneeling beside her. “I don’t want you to cut yourself.”

“No,” she insisted retaining control. “Besides I’m already bleeding.”

Direct hit. Ric cringed as he watched Alexis continue to pick up the jagged pieces.

“Go and finish Kristina’s book,” she prodded not taking her eyes off the floor. “Viola ran a few errands but she’ll be back soon to take Kristina to the park. I don’t want her to be here when you leave.”

He paused a minute, unable to believe the change in their once happy family. “Fine,” he said tight lipped and turned on his heels to go.

Alexis hadn’t intended to sound so harsh but she didn’t seem to be able to say anything right to Ric these days. It was as if their familiar connection and almost unspoken communication was now lost.

Sighing, she called “Wait,” and started to stand but the weight of the baby threw her center of gravity off and she fell backward. Ric lunged forward to catch her from behind securing his arms around her waist and placing his hands firmly on her stomach. They paused a minute feeling awkward with Alexis frozen in his arms.

Licking her lips, she started to pull away when she felt a familiar flutter inside. She recognized it from carrying Kristina and suspected that she’d felt it for a few weeks but this movement was more of a detectable spasm. Resting back in Ric’s arms she took his right hand in hers and returned it to her belly guiding it to where she first felt the movement.

“What is it?” he asked anxiously. “Is something wrong?”

“Shhh,” she hushed him. “Be quiet, close your eyes and keep your hand firmly where it is.”

For the first time in weeks Ric listened to his wife without argument and was rewarded by a tiny movement. Catching his breath, he opened his eyes and looked down at their hands over one another on her stomach and felt the twinge again, like a little muscle spasm coming from inside her abdomen.

“My God!’ he whispered profoundly. “I-I feel it.”

“That’s our child.” Alexis confirmed with a slight hitch in her voice.

“Make him do it again,” he begged keeping his hand firmly on her tummy.

“It’s not my call,” she smiled serenely. “He or she is on their own schedule right now. The baby should be more active in a few weeks.”

Looking back down, Ric noticed real red blood drops slowly beginning to drip on the white tile floor. Searching for the source, he picked up her left hand and opened it to find her clutching a large shard of glass.

“Alexis!” he panicked releasing her and grabbing a towel from the side of the sink. “You’re hurt!”

Pulling her to the sink he removed the shard and ran the towel under cold water carefully wrapping her hand as she winced in pain.

“Ric, it’s nothing, really. I’ll get a bandage from the medicine cabinet and it’ll be fine. I guess I got so caught up in the moment that I didn’t even feel it.”

“Nice try,” he said. “But I still want to get you to the hospital to have it looked at and wrapped right. That’s a deep cut and it’s on your left hand. You’re pretty helpless without it.”

“But we were going to have that talk remember?”

Ironically, in the last ten minutes, he hadn’t even thought about it but now it morosely came flooding back. This was not the time to delve into the merciless and messy details of his night with Reese. All he could think about now was the excitement of what they’d just experienced and getting Alexis to the ER.

“Alexis…it’ll have to wait. The facts aren’t going anywhere but we need to get moving now.”

“But what about Kristina?”

“I’ll leave a note for Viola,” he answered simply. “And she’ll come with us.”

***

“Ric?” Elizabeth asked as he practically dragged Alexis through the ER’s sliding doors and up to the desk. She was a little taken aback to see the Lansing family there together. Not much news escaped her and Liz knew that Ric recently moved out and took a room at the Metro Court.

“Alexis cut her hand,” he began.

“I can speak for myself, “ she cut in downplaying his concern. “It was a silly accident with a broken glass and I cut my palm. I could have just put a bandage on it at home.”

Ric gestured to the blood soaked towel. “I’d call this a little more serious than a minor cut.”

Liz looked from on to the other amused. Obviously the two still loved each other; they were bickering back and forth like an old married couple.

“Hell-o!” she raised her voice to capture their attention. “I’m going to call Steven and have him take a look at it just to be on the safe side. Alexis, you don’t want an infection.”

“Fine, “ she relented calmly smiling at Elizabeth. “I’m sorry, you’re right. It wouldn’t hurt to have your brother take a look.”

“Good,” Liz nodded and began to page Dr. Webber as Ric pulled Alexis aside.

“See? That wasn’t so difficult. Why can’t you just listen to me?”

“I don’t want to get too used to you taking care of me,” she answered candidly. “I know that I said that your leaving is going to be hard on Kristina but to be brutally honest Ric, it’s devastating for me as well.”

“We’ve been through this,” he sighed not wanting to but needing to be the heavy once again. “We’ve tried it several times but no matter how we put the pieces of our marriage together they don’t fit.”

“Yes, “ she reluctantly agreed. “I suppose that we just have different visions of what marriage should be, that’s all.”

“Perhaps,” he conceded equally unenthusiastic. “Alexis, I just can’t get pulled in different directions anymore. From the minute Kristina fell ill, I tried to make everyone get along and work together for her welfare. I wanted us all to be happy, you, Kristina, Sonny and me. But do you see where I am in this equation? I realized that the animosity, the relationship - if that’s what you want to call it - whatever it was between you and Sonny would always prevent us from having a peaceful coexistence. Eventually it would rip us all to shreds and the fallout would do irreparable damage to the children.

Look what Sonny and Carly’s dysfunctional marriage has done to Michael. How long before Morgan follows suit?

I can’t - no I won’t let Kristina and our child end up like Sonny’s kids or the way you and I did as children. They deserve more than that, don’t you think?”

Alexis reluctantly nodded and sniffed, starting to raise her left hand to brush away her tears but was met with the towel wrapped around her hand. Ric gently reached up and wiped her damp cheeks with his thumb as Steven Webber cleared the corner and strolled into the waiting room.

“Hello Alexis, Ric,” he nodded cordially. “I hear you had a bit of an accident?”

“Yes,” Alexis said thankful to change the subject.

He unwrapped the towel to take a quick look making small talk as he examined her hand. “So, how’s Kristina?”

Ric and Alexis looked at their daughter seated on the couch still engrossed in her book, One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Fish.

Steven’s eyes followed theirs and he smiled warmly at his “favorite” patient. “She’s an inquisitive child, I see. No doubt she has your collective intelligence. She’d make an excellent doctor some day.”

“Attorney,” Both Ric and Alexis corrected him in unison, then looked at each other stunned and speechless at finding even the slightest common ground. They stood for a minute trapped in weighty silence.

“Well!” Steven clapped his hands together freeing them from the uncomfortable moment. “Alexis, why don’t you come with me to Exam One and I’ll tend to that nasty laceration.”

He led her away and Ric grimaced wearily rubbing the back of his neck as he slowly strolled over to join Kristina in the lounge. In the past few hours, he’d run the gamut of so many emotions and it left him exhausted.

“Can I sit with you honey?” he asked with a tender smile and sank down into the couch next to his daughter.

“Boo fish!” she pointed at the page and he put his arm around her.

“Close!” he said then sounding more like Alexis added, ‘There’s an “L” in there. Can you say ‘bl-ue’?”

Kristina knit her small brow and sounded the word out when Elizabeth walked up beaming down at her.

“I can’t wait until Cameron learns to read. You’re good with her Ric. You’ll be a wonderful father.”

Caressing Kristina’s arm, Ric avoided Liz’s eyes and kept his glued to the book. She could see by the ashen color on his face that something was seriously wrong so she sat down on the couch opposite theirs and leaned forward.

“Ric?”

“Alexis and I are divorcing,” he stated simply yet sadly. “So I guess I’m going to have to learn how to be a good part-time father. Got any suggestions for that?”

“No, “she replied softly. “But I do have a question. Why?”

“Why?” he echoed almost sarcastically, chuckling lightly. “Sweet justice I guess. It’s what I get for coming to Port Charles in search of vengeance against Sonny. It nearly destroyed my life; it did destroy our marriage, but was that enough? No! I had to go chasing after Alexis Davis, win her over and become a father to my brother’s daughter.

Be careful what you ask for. You just might get it and love it and …love her mother. She was so desperate to protect her child and then save her when she got sick. Alexis never gave up. My entire plan just melted away leaving me with nothing but awe for the woman in front of me.

It became all about her,” he smoothed Kristina’s hair,” and this precious little girl. I guess I kind of fell into the home and family I’d always dreamed of.”

“Not such a bad thing Ric,” Liz pointed out. “It changed you. I saw it happening even when you didn’t realize it. You got a second chance at a family. Not everyone is that fortunate.”

“That’s what I thought, you know? But I didn’t factor in finding out the truth; that Sonny wasn’t the one who pushed you down those stairs, or how I’d feel after the children were kidnapped and Faith told me why she did it. Then Alexis got pregnant in the thick of it all and we were on overload. It took its toll on the both of us.”

Elizabeth looked at her ex husband well aware that she was only getting part of the story. Something tainted lurked within him but whatever it was, she could see that it was not potent enough to override the love he still felt for Alexis. That love persistently seeped through in his voice when he mentioned her name and reflected in his eyes as he ran his hand through Kristina’s hair.

He was still invested in this relationship and this family but his trust in Alexis had been badly bruised. At the risk of theorizing too much, Elizabeth cleared her throat and engaged Ric’s eyes.

“I imagine that this isn’t just about you and Sonny. I think it has to do with Alexis’s relationship with him as well. They have a complicated history full of fierce, almost blind loyalty on her part and a painful sense of abandonment when Sonny – as usual – put Carly back at the center of his universe. Discovering that she was pregnant by him must have been a shock. I know how that feels. Zander and I weren’t enemies like Sonny and Alexis are but we weren’t by any means together. He loved Emily and I was lost and confused.”

She reached out and touched his arm, urging Ric to listen.

“It takes a great act of love to raise a child out of wedlock. I can understand Alexis’s fear and why she might appear to have tunnel vision as far as Kristina is concerned.”

“Tunnel vision is putting it mildly!” he laughed weakly. “Kristina is her world, Sonny her obsession and me? Well, I come in a distant third on a good day.”

“Sounds like a bit of manufactured self pity if you ask me,” Liz concluded frankly. “I’ve seen Alexis walking with you hand in hand after your appointments with Dr. Meadows, and eating lollipops on the fourth floor. Steven told me about the “special delivery” that he made to her on your behalf and her reaction when she opened it. Does that sound like a distant third to you?”

“It’s more than that Elizabeth,” he argued almost grateful to her for playing devil’s advocate. “There were lies between us, betrayals that I don’t think we’ll be able to overcome.”

“There were lies and betrayal between us too if you’ll recall,” she reminded him. “And although I’ve moved on with my life and I’m so happy living with Lucky, part of me wishes that we’d addressed them and worked through them just to bring us both peace. I’d hate to see you make the same mistake twice.”

Ric found no viable comeback for her honesty.

Liz stood up as Steven and Alexis approached the waiting room with her left hand well wrapped.

“How’s the hand?” Liz asked.

“Thanks to your brother it’s going to be fine,” Alexis smiled then chuckled. “I’m just going to have to figure out how to be a “righty” for a while. There are days that I wish I was ambidextrous!”

“Remember to change the bandages regularly,” Steven reminded her. “And put that antibiotic ointment on it. If you weren’t expecting, I would have prescribed something stronger for the pain.”

“That’s OK,” she reassured him. “I’ve seen worse pain than this. I can take it.”

Elizabeth quickly glanced at Alexis then to Ric, her advice loud and clear and she returned to her post behind the desk.

“Mommy have boo boo?” Kristina asked curiously eyeing the bandages.

Alexis knelt and kissed her cheek. “Yes, but mama’s going to be just fine.”

Ric watched visibly moved at the sight of his family in front of him and Elizabeth’s words echoed in his head, “Don’t make the same mistake twice.”

He put his hand on Alexis’s back guiding her and Kristina to the elevator when he spied Dr. Winters coming around the corner. The doors opened and held them as they stepped in but did not join them in the car.

“I’ve got some business I need to take care of here at the hospital,” he handed her his car keys. “Do you think you can drive home? I’ll take a cab and pick up my car later – after Kristina’ s asleep.”

Alexis’s heart sank as she took the keys. Their brief time together as a family was obviously over.

“Sure. I can manage. Um, thank you for encouraging me to see a doctor and have this looked at, “ she said more formally.

“No problem,” he answered retreating to a safe distance as the doors closed between them. Waiting a beat, he let out a tense breath and turned walking over to the nurse’s station. “Excuse me, Dr. Winters?”

“DA Lansing,” she greeted him.

“Well, he observed mildly amused. “I guess not everyone has read the papers. I’m no longer the DA. I’m just an ordinary citizen of Port Charles like anyone else.”

“Oh,” she offered her sincere condolences. “I’m sorry to hear that.”

“So am I,” he concured. “We now have John Durant watching over our fine city. God help us all.”

Dr. Winters studied him carefully noting the clearly confused, sarcastic and fragile state he was in. “What can I do for you Ric?”

He nervously looked around the room and down at the floor, then back at her. “ Help me,” he admitted. “I want my life back but I don’t know if I can handle it. I- I was hoping to schedule an appointment to come and see you.”

She stepped behind the desk to the computer screen and pulled up her schedule checking her watch. “You’re in luck. If you can wait a half hour, I can see you at 3:00.”

“I have nowhere to be,” he chuckled at his newfound empty schedule. “I’ll see you then.”

chapter 02